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I’m allergic to tobacco and my wife of 27 years smokes. When we got married I asked her not to smoke in the house because of my allergy. And she doesn’t.
You should have a conversation about it with your husband. Explain why you don’t want to him smoking inside (breathing second hand smoke, the smell of smoke permeating the fabrics in your home, you don’t want any future kids subjected to second hand smoke, etc.) Explain that this is your home, too, and you have as much right to things in the home being the way you like as he.
Work out a compromise, like he gets one room where he can smoke inside and it’s not allowed anywhere else. But you both have to agree and keep the agreement.
Good luck.
Firstly never become his wife material!! You deserve better Secondly just be yourself. The person who loves you for you will want to marry you for that reason! (But don’t make marriage your goal. Just make having a happy loving relationship the end game)
To a false pretence.
Your ex girlfriend isn't someone else's “toy” she's a person! A human being and a super young one at that. The way you phrased this was incredibly objectifying and misogynistic.
You don't have to date anyone for any reason. You can break up with someone for any reason, in my opinion you don't need a “good” reason to do it. But the way you're looking at this situation is so bleak. I have a lot of empathy for young women in difficult situations because we've all been in a tough spot and faced a lot of judgment and made poor choices. I only hope she'll learn from this and grow as she's still a teenager. One thing she isn't is an object. We all make mistakes and buy into bs and suffer the consequences of our poor boundaries at some point or another. That's just an unfortunate part of growing up and some lessons have to be learned the hard way.
You don't have to date her and you don't have to even like her but self respect can take time to develop. So I think maybe some compassion may be a good thing to practice whilst enforcing your boundaries.
Maybe he is depressed. Do what you want, but tons of people that were fit at your age are no longer fit at his.
Not all psychopaths are murders. There's tests to determine how likely you are to be a psychopath. Usually there is a family history of mental illness. Do some research.
Hello, thanks a lot for sharing your experience. I'm sorry that your first marriage ended but it sounds like you've come out stronger from it. I'll keep your advice in mind and maybe reconsider.