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Date: February 12, 2023
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Ok… I know this is difficult to hear but many women talk like this early on in relationships… especially if they have been through other relationships while having that friend.
The colleague thing… if you were exclusive that is one problem and if not that is another.
Either way the solution for all of this is the same. Talk to her. Ask if you can talk about something a bit sensitive when you are alone together and in a position to have a talk. Tell her how you feel… Not what she did. How you feel. “I am feeling hurt, a bit angry and confused. I wanted to use your old phone and saw some messages from 3 years ago. I feel guilty for seeing these messages but also I am genuinely hurt you talked to a friend about our sex lie and that you are not satisfied. I also don’t feel like you are that interested in me sexually. Is that true? Can we talk through this?”
For the cheating…. Same deal…
This may be the end, but it may not. In the very least you will babe communicated effectively and know you made the right choice for .
I would just leave it as it was her dream she had.
Giving reassurance to a child only makes them feel justified in the stupid shit they come up with. I’d only reassure someone if any of my real life actions would cause confusion.
I didn’t say I do not trust him at all. I am only voicing my concerns. We have also been together for 9 months and I discovered the nudes/google searches 1-2 months into us dating.
I looked through his phone one time, and found serious dirt on it. Does that still mean he should be as secretive as he is now? Such as monitoring my every move when I want to change the song on Spotify during a long car drive? Explain.
I just don't get it though – why would he say he loves me and is “never leaving” then?
Where did she say he dropped the subject?
Yeah depending on where in Europe you were expecting the results to be from this could all be a huge technicality
He is not going to change. Trying to get him to change is a waste of time and energy. Figure out the best way ahead for yourself and your own happiness that doesn't involve him changing.
Women know 100% the kids is hers. Men don't. You aren't coming from an equal place on the issue. Give the man his peace of mind.
Block him.
Unfortunately it wasn’t arranged. I can’t believe I chose this for myself.
It has only been two months. I would suggest pulling the rip cord.