Couples counseling wouldn't help at this stage. OP's wife is just not at the point of accepting that some of the problems are, in fact, because of her behavior.
If you are happy now, enjoy it too the fullest. In the future if you are not so happy anymore in the relationship and you think it's best too leave, please just leave.
There's nothing wrong with acting towards the decisions you make for yourself.
OP, your gf wants to leave you and is planning to leave you when you are not home because she is scared of your reaction.
You brought it up but she denied it, so she doesn't want to discuss it.
Let her leave, what other advice did you expect? What other advice is rational?
You can just tell her that if it's true that she is leaving (please don't use the term “running away”, it's cringey and reminiscent of a child running away from home), tell her she can leave with your blessing and you won't impede her leaving. That way you can keep your dignity and make the process easier on her.
No good can come from resisting the process, no good can come from keeping her there against her will.
Terms like “boundaries” and “red flags” should be reserved for toxic or dysfunctional relationships. This ain't that: this is a fucking nightmare. I'm glad OP has woken up. For anyone else, this is your wake-up call.
Have you asked your boyfriend if he expects to stay at home supporting his family for the rest of his life? If he doesn't expect that, what does he think will happen to change the situation?
Your bf is mean and he’s not joking. This is how he sees you. Don’t allow anyone to insult you. Why are you still with him? You should be with someone who loves and appreciates you. Not this jackass who think he’s a know it all and take advantage of you.
Your bf is mean and he’s not joking. This is how he sees you. Don’t allow anyone to insult you. Why are you still with him? You should be with someone who loves and appreciates you. Not this jackass who think he’s a know it all and take advantage of you.
Does it even matter at this point? You've caught him in a big old pile of lies and misbehavior. Is catching him in one more going to tip the scales one way or another?
it’s my place her name is not on the lease only mine
Ok man I get that you're angry but in most places (these laws are highly location dependent) getting her out like that is goddamn illegal. That could get you into trouble.
Check your local laws and do things the right way.
I think you’re taking this a little too personally. You telling her that you don’t like being photographed would send a message that you don’t need to participate in the wedding party that will be photographed extensively. She probably has other friends that she is closer to or feels have the free time to commit to being a bridesmaid.
I am so glad my husband and I skipped wedding parties completely to avoid any bs drama that comes along with it. So much drama for absolutely no reason. People get hurt because they aren’t “chosen” or then get mad because they don’t have the time/money to commit to duties that are associated with bridesmaids… it’s a whole fucking debacle. And it’s exhausting for everyone involved…
Consider yourself lucky that you don’t have to participate in the least fun part of a wedding, truly!!!
Right now is a deciding moment on your life. YOU were granted a baby despite growing fertility concerns. YOU are ready. YOU have the means to support said child. And YOU want the child! Don't even consider his side. Given your age and fertility issue this could be a once in a lifetime opportunity and if you squander it for this dipshit you will love to regret it. He will either man up and stay or likely leave. But being a single parent is way better then being an adult in an emotionally abusive relationship.
Oh, yeah…. Some of his biggest tango have been about sex. And I’ve provided some pretty good and frequent sex. It just wasn’t enough.
Couples counseling wouldn't help at this stage. OP's wife is just not at the point of accepting that some of the problems are, in fact, because of her behavior.
Call his bluff…move out…block him….
Float like water…
If you are happy now, enjoy it too the fullest. In the future if you are not so happy anymore in the relationship and you think it's best too leave, please just leave.
There's nothing wrong with acting towards the decisions you make for yourself.
OP, your gf wants to leave you and is planning to leave you when you are not home because she is scared of your reaction.
You brought it up but she denied it, so she doesn't want to discuss it.
Let her leave, what other advice did you expect? What other advice is rational?
You can just tell her that if it's true that she is leaving (please don't use the term “running away”, it's cringey and reminiscent of a child running away from home), tell her she can leave with your blessing and you won't impede her leaving. That way you can keep your dignity and make the process easier on her.
No good can come from resisting the process, no good can come from keeping her there against her will.
Terms like “boundaries” and “red flags” should be reserved for toxic or dysfunctional relationships. This ain't that: this is a fucking nightmare. I'm glad OP has woken up. For anyone else, this is your wake-up call.
Have you asked your boyfriend if he expects to stay at home supporting his family for the rest of his life? If he doesn't expect that, what does he think will happen to change the situation?
You should have burned that bridge after the first time he kicked you out. Time to finally cut your losses
He absolutely must be the one who immediately plunge the toilet once he's blocked it.
He also should eat more fiber and push those fluids.
Your bf is mean and he’s not joking. This is how he sees you. Don’t allow anyone to insult you. Why are you still with him? You should be with someone who loves and appreciates you. Not this jackass who think he’s a know it all and take advantage of you.
Your bf is mean and he’s not joking. This is how he sees you. Don’t allow anyone to insult you. Why are you still with him? You should be with someone who loves and appreciates you. Not this jackass who think he’s a know it all and take advantage of you.
Does it even matter at this point? You've caught him in a big old pile of lies and misbehavior. Is catching him in one more going to tip the scales one way or another?
PS- OF COURSE HE GOT THE FUCKING LAP DANCE.
The woman can have an abortion (provided she legally can).
The choice is hers.
it’s my place her name is not on the lease only mine
Ok man I get that you're angry but in most places (these laws are highly location dependent) getting her out like that is goddamn illegal. That could get you into trouble.
Check your local laws and do things the right way.
Not sure whether I should ask for those things? To be honest, I felt I'd be asking too much, and he is very likely to reject me.
Personally not worth it , I’d leave this dude and I’m a dude
You need to stop worrying about upsetting more than just him
This is your LIFE
You are not compatible for a long term relationship. Cut your losses now before you waste even more time on this man
20 years+ and you are paying his bills, is this some kind of fucking joke?
No plans for marriage, he won't help you raise any kids he has makes with you, no reason to think he will be a provider
What are you doing? Charity for the elderly?
I think you’re taking this a little too personally. You telling her that you don’t like being photographed would send a message that you don’t need to participate in the wedding party that will be photographed extensively. She probably has other friends that she is closer to or feels have the free time to commit to being a bridesmaid.
I am so glad my husband and I skipped wedding parties completely to avoid any bs drama that comes along with it. So much drama for absolutely no reason. People get hurt because they aren’t “chosen” or then get mad because they don’t have the time/money to commit to duties that are associated with bridesmaids… it’s a whole fucking debacle. And it’s exhausting for everyone involved…
Consider yourself lucky that you don’t have to participate in the least fun part of a wedding, truly!!!
Right now is a deciding moment on your life. YOU were granted a baby despite growing fertility concerns. YOU are ready. YOU have the means to support said child. And YOU want the child! Don't even consider his side. Given your age and fertility issue this could be a once in a lifetime opportunity and if you squander it for this dipshit you will love to regret it. He will either man up and stay or likely leave. But being a single parent is way better then being an adult in an emotionally abusive relationship.