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Daisy, 22 y.o.
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Date: September 26, 2022
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There are literally 8 billion people on earth, you should be with one that respects you
You have a friend that you have been talking to that happens to be a girl. Either she is not interested beyond your attention, or she has convinced herself that even if she is attracted to you, you are never going to make the move.
She is def in the friend zone. It is not clear which of you, if not both, put her there.
Yup. Reminds me of the “missing missing reasons”
Initially, I wanted to give him the benefit of the doubt as well — perhaps, he's just busy or bad at texting.
But after posting this and reading your comment, I sort of started comparing our initial conversations to our current ones, and it's not like he was bad at texting from the get-go, rather there has been a sudden decline I feel.
I feel I initiate a lot of the conversation, and he just goes with it and never really brings anything to the table himself.
I think that I wouldn't mind it if he texted me less if it meant that he would actually seem interested when we did talk or perhaps, initiate the conversation from time to time.
I'm glad you were so thoughtful in giving your advice, and I'm also glad that your situation had a positive outcome, however, I don't think it's the same case for mine.
I'll just step back for now, and clear my head. Not going to dive right back into the dating pool yet, but just let things take their due course.
I have a few thoughts on this. You are not really going to be able to tell her relationship is going to go after three weeks Because the relationship is in its honeymoon phase essentially. What the two of you will eventually have to do is figure out where all of this is going. If both of you are having a positive influence on one another that's all good in the short term. What she may come to realize is that as you age friends become rather transactional and transient, that's all based on mutual interest.
I tend to agree with some of the people who have posted here for very different reasons. There are always exceptions to the rule but there's an interesting study on age gap and marriage this shows a correlation in age difference and divorce rate. Now I'm going to round this up because you're closer to the middle number and just state that you have an approximately 39% chance, should you get married, of an ending in a divorce. Generally speaking 50% of first marriages don't work out, second marriages and third marriages fair even worse. So, for the benefit of both of you, going forward you really need to not only work on yourselves but work on a partnership if you have any hope of making this work.
21 years old is not almost a child or anything close to a child. It is not “practically a kid” or anything remotely close to a kid, but an adult with adult responsibilities that may differ slightly from a 28 year old but they are still adult responsibilities. One of the major problems we have in society – the ever expanding infantilization of adult human beings.
I know some of those forever a child narrative types that are in their 30s and 40s now and guess what they have in common they're all completely miserable with a long list situationships and failed relationships. They tend to be in a constant crisis cycle the anxiety and depression that is their own making. Why? Because they never wanted to grow up and they had all sorts of people on the Internet telling them they never had to.
The other better solution to this is you pick up your self worth and exit this relationship.
I've been where you are with my ex. I didn't fit the m.o. of his exes and he would tell me they were very attractive, imply or say his coworkers were attractive and basically anyone but me was attractive. Oh wait, he said I was “cute” alot if I tried hard to fish for compliments.
The irony is he was far from my type or attractive. Over time the more I fell in love with him, he was attractive to me. I didn't let on I thought he was ugly.
Don't waste your time with someone that's going to make you feel insecure about your appearance. It's not worth it