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Date: October 8, 2022
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Even tho what I said was morbid?
I am a dude getting hit in balls hurt no doubt there but he seem clearly unwell getting that mad over a accidentally and after you said multiple times sorry? Yeah thank him he break up with you cause he is a nut job
Gross. Now I feel really gross. He said he was never attracted to her but now I don’t believe anything he says.
Yeah definitely just focus on letting her know you care about her, are there to listen and stand by her. Don’t try to dig for more facts or “solve” the issue. Let her tell you more as she’s ready.
Dude, ask her for clarification ?
That doesn’t make your behavior any less ridiculous.
Yes please . Id personally dump anyone keeping track like that
I never understand it that the person asking someone out has to pay the bill….is it a culture thing??? I always liked to split the bill, (each paid for there lunch that is what it means to me) I also neverminded to pay the bill and demanded it if someone i dated came from far away. It is not a red flag to me, even if she choose the location.
What a bItch, f*ck I would scream at her and never talk to her again
So.. not a lawyer, but I'm pretty sure that's assault. Maybe battery. And.. HOLY WTF.. who cuts someone's hair when they're sleeping? Wtf is wrong with this guy? Kick him in the nuts and run.
What sort of pics are we talking about? Like skimpy sexy pics or just regular everyday photos?
Research?? Source.
Explains why he was desperate for you not to drug test your kid.
That is honestly the worst part of this. He is dating and fucking a 21 yr old that he watched grow up…. As a 39 yr old man.
Oof, telling on yourself and the company you keep there, bud. Very loudly.
You know your sister is inappropriate around your fiancé. Why is she hanging out with you both. She should’ve been uninvited. You brought this on yourself.
You can grow with your partner, and be a support for them as you work through obstacles, without living with them. They are not mutually exclusive.
going to do exactly that. just needed to hear this
From the sounds of it, you should try being single and working on yourself. Try to figure out why you are seeking validation from people who you admit don't care about you. Other good men will come along.
Oh sweetheart no.
He’s too old for you – he can’t do anything for you except ruin your life.
Your slipping in this area? How long have you been together if your at the “comfortable” stage – several years?!! I have the big ick
What do you mean by It seems like I have a lot of anxiety?
The way the post is written it seems like you're stressing about really small things. It honestly reminded me a lot of myself and I have a lot of anxiety. Just a lot of focus on small negative things, kind of a rush of words.
But it sounds like you're having a lot of outside stress anyway – moving to a new area where you aren't fully comfortable. I wish I had advice.
Since you added context, everything you said just seems like a normal valentine's day.
He sounds jealous and possessive.
He shouldn’t get so upset when someone else shows interest in you.
He felt hurt/attacked that someone had tried to ask for your number and he wanted to hurt you right back. That’s not a healthy way to deal with those feelings.
Tbh he sounds immature.
You could try having a conversation with your bf about the way he handled the situation. Reassure him your not about to leave him for anyone else, but he can’t react that way and needs to realize that with how great you are – it’s likely some other people will notice.
Lol, and then what? Ruin your child's life and make it have a statistically worse outcome over nothing? Get the paternity test in secret you idiot. Don't tell your spouse out loud that you think that not only is she actively chatting on you, but that she would secretly force you to twist another man's child.
I think you're being paranoid. Talk to him about it.
Glad to hear you will be taking a step back from it all. I hope everything works out for you both.
Get out now before you erode and struggle to recognize yourself.
Do not rely on him financially.
Get out!
OP it sounds like you have some hoarding tendencies. The sugar packets are one thing, but the sillica packets? Kinda offbeat for sure.
If there are no kids, then it's a blessing. She did you a HUGE favor, in the long run. The pain of today will subside, you'll find someone infinitely better for you, and you'll be happy. Mourn, let it pass through you, and let your bros take over for a while. If you get the chance, be grateful to them for being there for you, and be sure to thank the friend that sent you the videos. She knew you didn't deserve it and she risked it all to make it right.
Thank you. I will. Time is of the utmost importance.
Sorry you're dealing with this horrific situation! Are you SURE that your girlfriend wasn't doing drugs while she was pregnant? This could have SERIOUS repercussions for your precious Daughter. IF you decide to remain in the relationship, I would make MANDATORY weekly drug tests a must as well as the majority of her paychecks going into YOUR account until you can catch up on bills (I can't believe she could be SO reckless both financially and with the safety of your baby)!
IF your girlfriend is truly dealing with PPD/PPA or depression in general she NEEDS to be under a doctor's care. I'm not sure that I would trust her to take care of your child while you're at work, is there anyone who could watch your baby for the next couple of weeks at least or stay over at your home? HOPEFULLY your girlfriend HASN'T been breastfeeding your daughter AT ALL during these past SIX months! If she has then your Daughter NEEDS to be tested IMMEDIATELY! God, I'm SO very sorry that you're dealing with this! The possible ramifications are truly horrifying! Best wishes and many Blessings for a positive and least damaging outcome!
It's also impossible for him to not relapse if op needs them herself so they'll always be around
Very true, but still worth a good shot.
It sounds like he has a normal sex drive just much higher than yours. It also sounds like he is a good person who did not want to be unfaithful to his partner. If a male over the age of 15 does not have a normal sex drive, they should get checked out by a dr to make sure their testosterone lvl are good. You need to be extremely upfront with any future partners that sex is basically off the table. It is cool that you don't want to have sex. You have every right to live your life how you want. Do not feel pressured into anything that makes you uncomfortable. As an aside, I have no idea about female hormones, but you might ask your Dr about it. You might have some type of imbalance that is treatable? Like I said, not Dr. No idea but it might be worth looking into.
No, he mention anything about feeling cut off or left out. Just planning for the future
totally get you
I had my (not) fun experiences with white people so nowadays as an adult I take a long time just to trust someone white, fully. I have a full set of criteria when it comes to them. Not that I fear them, but I'd rather not allow myself to go through the same shit I went through as a kid with a few of them.
Many times those who are really nice end up saying something stupidly racist when they're too comfy around me. That happens, I cut them off. I'm just too old for that shit xD
Thank you, I think I will try and find a UK helpline and see of they can talk me through it x
Having a cluttered/messy house just makes me feel so anxious and frustrated, I’ve tried going on strike before & telling myself that I should stop letting him get away with it. But after days of things just piling up, I can’t sit by and let my home be a wreck. He just doesn’t care. He says he isn’t as bothered by mess as I am, so why should my standards apply to him?
I’ve really been considering leaving him recently, which makes me so sad because I really love him and wanted things to work out this time. We have other issues on top of this (him not having a full-time job being the main one). When we started dating, his apartment was always spotless. I guess that was just for show, because as soon as he got comfortable with me it all flew out the window.
It's not one issue. It's literally every issue you've brought up as “he agrees with me on such-and-such”. He doesn't agree with you on those things, he pretends he does to get brownie points. If he really agreed with them he wouldn't give them up.
He is literally telling you that his job is the most important thing in the world to him. Not you, not your future kids, not the well being of literally teens of millions of other people.
Again, let me reiterate: he is not the best you can do. Hell, no 21-year-old is. 21-year-old men are shit.
Is that really all you got from what she said? You’re staying with someone who is a piece of shit because he doesn’t hit you.
Because to him a kid is a shiny new toy that his wife takes care of for him. The more the merrier.
Sorry but why would you have more kids knowing she’s had PPD with every single pregnancy, and that she isn’t doing mentally well….. especially if it’s the last pregnancy that sent her over the edge.
no what you suggested is just extremely immature
It's really gross and weird and unsafe to meet someone for the first time in a hotel room. I saw someone posted the poor Canadian girl getting murdered in a similar meetup situation. That should give you a wake up call.
Be smart – if this guy could hide his shit teeth and fatness from you for four (!!!!) months, he could be hiding a lot more.
How did you never video chat??
if I don’t come because his grandmother would be driving him to the station to pick me up. I
Wtf, just tell him you are not going and grandmother does not have to pick you up. You are in a abusive relationship. Dont go to meet him. That is a fucking stupid move.
He did delete them when he saw how upset I was. He said he completely forgot about them but he had no problem deleting it in front of me
She doesn‘t take full responsibility bro, someone who blames it on a cOndItIoN doesn‘t take accountability.
Wake up and leave this person.
Google “roommate contract” it will give you some ideas of topics you need to bring up.
“Hey boyfriend, now that we have been living together for a week and are starting to settle in there are some things we need to discuss…” like chores around the house, what time you each like to go to bed/wake up, how are we dividing up the cost of household essentials, etc. His responses will tell you things you need to know upfront to decide if this is going to work out or not. Stick to your guns on things that are important to you, be willing to compromise on things that you are not as concerned with. Don’t let him walk all over you or blow it off.
But also, sit down and discuss the renovations. He is your boyfriend, not your handy man. Unless the agreement was he lives there rent free and fixes stuff for you in exchange for rent. I’d also be annoyed if as soon as I moved in I was expected to take on a lot of manual labor that only really benefitted my boyfriend in the long run, if my name isn’t also on the house.
But the fact that she knew about how i was uncomfortable with it and she continue on liking this guy.. even after he comes and goes in a space of 2 months.. isnt that emotional cheating? Crossing boundaries i mean.
You’re an adult. No one has to “let” you do anything.