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evidence35, y.o.
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Date: November 6, 2022
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My last paragraph addresses the fact that he did indeed break a boundary.
Tbh I'd just block him and move on with your life. He is basically gone now anyway, so you confronting him to me just seems like it'll stir up more feelings and make you more upset.
I think maybe just learn from this that in the future, if you have a situationship when you want a relationship, you have to set those boundaries. If they leave because you set them, that's on them not you.
Yeah, so you claim that he is “a very loving boyfriend” that you feel like you are the perfect match. But I do not see it. At all.
There is NOTHING in your post that screams “loving boyfriend” or “perfect match”.
What your post does show:
He refused to put any effort into visiting you.
He demands so much of your attention, that he is impacting on your quality of life. And he doesn’t care.
He is emotionally manipulative & so insecure, he thinks that you not immediately responding to messages means you are breaking up with him.
He objects to every decision that you make (that realistically, are really none of his business).
He says and does things that he KNOWS will upset you, but makes you feel bad because he is upset at how you reacted.
Hun, what you described goes beyond basic “clinginess”. He is emotionally manipulative & insecure and is trying to use that to control what you do, and make you feel bad for upsetting him.
You can’t fix his insecurities. He has to. But it seems pretty obvious he has zero desire & wants to make them your problems, not his.
It’s gonna be ok. You have to have an honest open conversation with your wife. Are her needs being met? What can you do to improve sex with her? Maybe introduce the idea of non-monogamy.
Have you spoken to him before about this? If yes what did he say?
Just curios, you say you are a romantic person, do you ever do something romantic for him?
Also maybe your BF knows that you are sexting multiple people while in a relationship with him and that makes him less inclined to be romantic towards you.
Your dating guru friends will probably land you with a shitty rep if you take their advice. When someone says they're not interested, they're not interested. The last thing you should do is try to pressure them into caving.
Yea, dump this guy.