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❤️❤️❤️ ????? ❤️❤️❤️, 25 y.o.
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Date: October 4, 2022
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Your boundaries are totally your own and you can do whatever you want. In fact you should. Never make yourself uncomfortable to meet someone else’s expectations.
However, if you are looking for outside perspectives (which again I don’t really think are relevant)I would break up the first time I heard this type of talk. It sounds like a super odd way to think but more importantly I find the whole idea of “you marry get a different person then you dated” mentality to be super toxic and gross.
I’m gonna borrow a quote from one Ross Geller, “THEY WERE ON A BREAK!!”
In all seriousness I can understand feeling hurt about the lies but if you guys were on a break and he chose to hook up with other people but you didn’t, that’s a you problem and not him problem. But the lying would be a red flag for me personally
You were taken advantage of, 100%.
Vastly underrated comment
Except that she could be incubating/carrying what he has and passing it around to her whole family.
Grow the fuck up, geezus
You could try approaching it from a point of view of “I happened to be reading something… It mentioned everyone should change their undies daily…. Made me think of our convo and I was curious so did some more reading…. Turns out you SHOULD be changing daily too! Let's make a routine of it together” (insert filler where I've written “…”)
So it doesn't feel like you're telling her off or think she's gross, you're just like “huh it turns out! Who knew!”
Make it your decision. You think it’d be better to wait until you can go with your partners. You are not willing to put Beth in a position to feel at all uncomfortable about your relationship. And you really want to continue your friendship, but also want to make sure that you have proper boundaries in place for your partners.
I get where you are coming from, I know they are a touchy subject for many couples. I’ll also put out there that we aren’t monogamous, so our boundaries are different than many other couples. My partner thinks other women interacting with me is hot (as long as it’s real, so she’s not into strip clubs for that reason).
I think any of those limits in the relationship are ok, they just need to be discussed and nothing hidden!
Nothing like going from bad to worse and then trying to make yourself feel better.
“I will never cheat again”… I’ve heard that before ?
I just think you keep making excuses for your behavior. You keep trying to defend your cheating based on your husbands attitude. Then made an excuse about “wanting” to divorce for years. Then your friends are “neutral” when they’re obviously not since they were okay with the cheating. Like I’m not sure if you hear yourself at all and you’re just putting whatever is in your head so it makes sense and you don’t feel as bad. Geeze. All 3 of you are immature. The band dude seemed like he manipulated you into this situation. Knowing you’re married, in a bad marriage, and using codependency as ammo to be with you and have an affair? Then saying you’re trying to be independent when you had an affair and went straight to another relationship afterwards? I just can’t lol
Wow I think to many others it might sounds like she is massively overreacting BUT if I was placed in this situation I think I might have majorly freaked out too.
I have ADHD and getting on top of my work take massive efforts and coordination. I take pride in my work. There might be underlying nuances that my partners might not be privy to, too. For eg. Need to show bosses I’m trying to perform better , conflict with colleagues, huge deal/project underway.
If my partner overstepped and went to my boss straight, obviously any normal “nice” boss will say yes out of courtesy, but it doesn’t mean anything. The boss probably also don’t know exactly what is she working on now.
If she was already having a frazzled day and have work plans ongoing , going to this “surprise” spa day (which tbh seemed like you enjoy more than her in general lol), would be a huge disruption of her mind and emotions.
I’m not saying what she did is right but it just feels like you didn’t respect her work and her time by going straight to her boss and cancelling her entire day just like this. Does it feel like it’s not important to you? Why can’t it be done on a weekend ? Idk man.
You’ve done nothing wrong. You were correct to be completely open about it. If your bf can’t get over it, that’s his problem to solve. You aren’t doing anything to make him worried or suspicious. If he keeps bringing it up in arguments, that’s low and childish. He needs to stop. I would not put up with that.
? – if you asked right afterwards, and she was unconscious prior, how did she have any idea of what you did prior to bringing her to orgasm unless you detailed what happened?
Stay away. If he had really changed, he would have understood why contacting you again was a horrible idea.
Plenty of people make it work with age and cultural differences, granted that can add layers of challenge to a relationship, but those can be managed.
This doesn't sound like that. This sounds like someone being a jerk and treating you like a kid. He wants to control the topics you discuss with friends because he spends money on you? Wtf is that about. And then points 4 5, and 6, among others.
Just sounds like a straight up selfish person if all of this is true as presented. I'm not gonna tell anyone to break up because I don't know all the details, but I think if this relationship is to be successful it's time to have a serious discussion and start setting some hard boundaries.
You’re wrong. That’s like saying somebody who has a brain tumor that’s pressing on the frontal lobe has complete control over their behavior. Medical conditions that cause fluctuations in hormones can absolutely impact how a person behaves and how they perceive their behavior.
If my wife spent $18,000 on ANYTHING behind my back that would be grounds for divorce. Yikes.
He's abusing the term “abuse.” Nothing you did was abusive, you did nothing wrong, and it would be best if you were no longer friends with him.
I would try and go to both. My husband and I went to different schools. He didn’t want to go to his so we just went to mine instead.
No, dude. It’s over. Let it go. Find your happiness somewhere else.
Cute. If she really wanted to tRaP a DrOne, she’d have done it after the wedding. Taps forehead.
Have you and your partner tried toys to see if that works for you?
You’re dating a 27 year old, with extreme insecurities, with a shit-stirrer for a friend. The “friend” is the one highlighting what Instagram posts you like, the “friend” is the one telling your gf she saw you coming out of a restaurant.
Your gf’s insecurities are likely due to the friend constantly keeping her second guessing. The friend could be doing it because of a codependent relationship with your gf, or just because she wants your gf to be single with her again. Doesn’t really matter why, the problem is you likely will not convince your gf that this friend is toxic and isn’t really her friend.
So you can waste your time trying and fighting this BS from someone old enough to know better, or you can go find someone who does know better.
he blew off our plan to go with one of those girls.
So, he chose this girl over you? He rather have a date with her than be with you?
He already promised not to use those apps anymore so why is he using them again? Isn’t it, a promise is a promise?
Also, if he’s telling the truth that he only wants to learn and to show good intentions, why is he not talking to men only?