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♥️Independent Model♥️, 23 y.o.
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Date: October 17, 2022
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The only boundary I would urge you to reconsider is living together before marriage. You may be compatible apart, but living together is a totally different animal. That's how you find out if you can really get along for the long haul. It's a lot easier to break a lease than to get divorced. Source: I am someone who only moved in with a guy after getting married and we got divorced less than 5 years later.
The space can last a while, but verbally communicating depends on the reason. But the thing is, ive already tried speaking about this very very very very many times. My feelings and boundaries are ignored. This isnt a situation where the lemgth has always been the lemgth, its longer now because talking it out doesnt change anything. So again, what is unhealthy about it? I would understand if i shut down at every chance to compromise, but thats not the situation. This ismt a poor coping mechanism. This is a result of trying to resolve over and over with no change. We are waiting for a couples therapist, we have our own therapists. We both are on meds. She asked for a couples counselor back in september. Theres nothing i can do to resolve amything. Talking it out does nothing, but this can be fixable if we have the proper counselling but idk if we would even last long enough til then
ok
Correct.
I think it’s super sus this ex wanted to know About your bf and not longer after you told about him he broke up. My guess is he wants you and sabotaged your relationship. He’s petty af for Not running things by you and confirming facts before outright ghosting you
He wants you to panic and freak out don’t give him that satisfaction. You still have him on Facebook right?
Go out with the girls, have fun and post a picture titled “when the trash takes itself out, living my best life” and give it a day or two and then delete him as a friend and never look back.
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This is such bullshit, lmao
No. If you need to be apart to solve the problem then that’s the answer to the relationship.
Solve the issues or end it.
Time only delays and avoids ending it.
I'd simply say to your friend that while you understand that in the past these holidays have just been the two of you that you all are grown adults now and things change. You're in a serious relationship now and you want your partner included. That while she for some reason does not want to include her partner, you want to share this experience with yours and that you don't want to put your girlfriend in the position to have to even have an opinion on you going away on a trip she's specifically excluded from.
Mandatory Thunder from Down Under
I edited the text into the parent post
No, the dude is being shit on by everyone when he's done nothing wrong. If i feel the need to defend him on the internet and waste my time, that's my prerogative.
You're not my mom.
Ignore my responses if you don't like them, come up with a thoughtful response, or better yet give the OP advice instead of giving me dumb unsolicited opinions.
Your reply here is the equivalent of talking because you like the sound of your voice.
Ask yourself, are you okay with such behaviour? If not, fucking leave already
Yes, interesting to note though that if something has a 1% chance to occur per event, and you iterate over that event 100 times it has a 63.4% chance of happening. I get that it’s probably even higher than 99% chance but if you think about having sex frequently throughout a long term relationship your easily looking at good chance of it happening.
Ask him to shave .
Easy ways to be romantic
-be genuine in your compliments
-Tell her you love her and why more
-Tell her she is gorgeous or beautiful when you notice
Appreciate her for what she does and tell her how lucky you feel
-when you are out at the store pick up a little treat or flower for her occasionally
-order fancy take out so she doesn't have to cook if you have the money
-give her a back or foot rub
-light candles and tidy the room for date night. Include wine, hot cocoa or her fancy drink of choice
-what's in your area? Is there a fancy bakery you can pick up am order from? Is there a new restaurant? Ice cream shop? Park to walk in? Other attractions? Surprise her with an idea or treat.
-send her loving texts during the day
-if you start running out of ideas ask her what being romantic looks like to her.
Neither or them are his concern, there her families and partners concern, and the monster part, is a shit excuse, how does it make you a monster for not wanting or being able to pay your exs rent, while you and your new partner plan a future together, she not his responsibility anymore I think he just making excuses at this point, just stick to she not your problem anymore, your not together, the money your giving her could help us plan our future, with a place and kids and what ever else, but all you are doing is delaying our future for an ex, who partner should man the hell up a support her, and say you are no longer ok with having to put your life on hold for her, because he is scared of being labelled a monster? there three people in the relationship and you've had enough so he choses your future or paying his exs rent. Just don't back down when he says about the cancer and being a monster??♀️ just keep saying those are excuses not reasons, if your seriously willing to risk this relationship for an ex your apparently don't want anymore just because of what people might lable you, then your not who I thought you was
Someone’s bad reaction is not what makes it the wrong answer. The answer given shows both maturity and kindness, and someone not being able to recognize it as such is reflective of them and not the respondent. Then again, asking such a question in the first place is reflecting of the asker.
Incels to stop commenting on my post. Can you help me out?
This post has reached one of our comment/karma limits. The text of the post has been preserved below.
To preface, my husband and I are in our late twenties and have been together for 9 years. We have a one and a half year old toddler and expecting our second child next month. Our relationship has been on the rocks since we got pregnant with the second child, and has progressively deteriorated over the last 3 months. We have been fighting almost daily, and even discussed separating. I feel like he’s been pushing my boundaries lately and his actions have not been consistent with his words or promises. We have been working with a marriage counselor and that hasn’t been effective. He has been asked to work out of town last month, to which he agreed to do. This wasn’t mandatory, but he agreed to do it to stand out for future promotions. This pregnancy has been very difficult for me, with multiple health complications, and having to care for a very active toddler. It’s been very physically and mentally taxing to say the least, so when he agreed to work out of town for month only coming home on the weekends, I was really irritated and upset. While working out of town I found out he is going to the bars and staying out til midnight or closing time, if not every day, then every other day. He was going out with his coworker who apparently is also having marriage problems. This is not something he does at home, especially since I thought we went though that phase in our early 20s. When I confronted him, he said he felt like I was controlling him and mothering him and this was a way for him to do what he wanted to. He promised to not “go crazy” after the first week, but continued to go even after he promised he wouldn’t. He even went as fa as to leave his phone with the location on, in his hotel room, so I wouldn’t know he went out. The second week of being there my sister texted me a screenshot of a picture he send her of his dick at 2am. He then messaged her saying “oh fuck, I didn’t mean to send that to you. WTF. I’m so sorry. So embarrassing…it was intended for your sister. I’m so sorry ?” now I’ll admit, my sister is much more attractive than me, but my husband never gave me a reason to believe he would do something so hurtful to me, especially while I’m pregnant with his child. He has always been very respectful and never gave me a reason to doubt his loyalty. I tried to analyze the situation and it just doesn’t add up in my head as being an accident. First of all, he never sends me pictures like that, especially now with the volatile state of our relationship. Also, my sister’s and my name don’t start with the same letter, and he hasn’t talked to her in a couple of months so she wouldn’t be at the top of his list of people to text. When I confronted him, he kept saying it was an accident, but he couldn’t explain how he managed to send her this picture. I am so hurt and devastated. I’m very close to my family, and it’s making it difficult for me to be around my sister now. I really don’t know how to move on from this. Does anyone think this could have been an accident or is my husband just a pig?
Pretty sure she didn’t force them to kiss, lick champagne off him and disappear into a room with him. Maybe this other person didn’t want him fucking his life up for a cheater. It’s the decent thing to do.
Fortunately, Jack won't be in the city for the wedding so he won't come. But if he was, I am certain my fiance and his sister wouldn't be able to not invite him and he'll ask me to let it go and let him enjoy the reception.
Info: why don’t you change your surname to her surname so you all match?