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@at goal dildo in pussy #milf #naughty #mature #wet #anal and more [110 tokens remaining]
Date: November 24, 2022
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It's really hard to say because only he really knows, but my guess (as a regular ghoster and watcher of terrible romcoms), would be that he had a moment to reflect on his vulnerability and realised that he couldn't face you leaving and didn't know how to tell you.
REEEEEEEEE
I thought you care about your friend and their health and that's called 'friendship'. Isn't it?
Cheating or no cheating.. this type of behavior is obviously unacceptable in a healthy relationship.
But the main issue for me right now is not cheating, but rather the fact that she won't admit it. I can eventually move past the cheating, but not if she's lying about it.
All the evidence is pointing towards it .. but what if?
I think enough time has passed and you’ve been together plenty. I don’t think it’s unreasonable of you to ask her if she’d like to be exclusive.
You belong to marvel not to my comments
How long were you dating that you were in love with her already? She just lost her husband five months ago. When did she start dating again?
Omg. This sounds like you guys are still in high school. Super immature. And now there will be a baby? Time to stop focusing on who did what to whom etc and focus and learning to respect each other enough to support each other with your child.
I would! If I found out my bf would go down on his ex but won’t on me, I would leave. Absolutely.
You aren't going to get any advice here that is going to rekindle his interest. You might as well try a love potion for all the good such advice will do.
It hurts, but he's just not that into you and possibly never was. He is 20. I was an idiot when I was 20. Most people are! In comparison to their older selves at least.
Why are you so into him? Ask yourself; is it his amazing personality or is it his growing lack of interest and deliberate unavailability that is driving you to want him more? Thebkess he wants you, the more it seems to make you want him. It's worth reflecting on that. He's a 20 year old boy who isn't treating you very well. Come on, you can do better.
End it on your terms before he ends it on his. He potentially lacks the maturity to spare your feelings or avoid humiliating you. Tell him that it's become clear that he isn't really that interested in the kind of relationship you are looking for. Tell him it feels you are a lot more into him than he is into you and that's not healthy for you so you are ending it.
And, on behalf of all future partners and for yourself, please, please please don't let yourself become one of those people who obsesses over a pathetic specimen of an ex, who can't move on and let's obsession with this one guy poison the next couple of relationships. Put him out of your head and move on
A lot of well said points
It’s tough for me to respond in a positive way.
Thanks tho.
Do you mind expanding?
He asked you to be exclusive before knowing how old you are? That seems strange. Like. That's basic information that should have already been shared. But I guess I can see how it might not come up. I also look a lot younger than I am, and often get approached by men who are clearly younger than me, so I guess I'm just used to already saying hey I'm 35. I know I look younger than that, but I'm too old for you. Usually I get asked when I graduated, it's a small town lol. So the shock when I tell them is like wait. How old are you, then? I can pass for ten years younger.
I am SO sorry that you experienced this.
when I started wearing a fake engagement ring bc I was long distance with my now husband, I got MORE attention at the clubs. I didn't expect that! I guess some guys think it's more of a challenge?
I would tell your mom. She deserves to know, and it is clear your dad does not have the courage to tell her.
Sou da like something she needs to work on. You've done nothing wrong.
“my 45 year old boyfriend tries to control me and won't let me be myself. how do I make him happy?”
Add on “How do I get him to see that this makes me sad and get him to stop?” and you'll have the TL:DR of nearly every age gap post here. The answer is always “He knows it hurts you, he doesn't care, this is precisely why he's dating someone two decades his junior. 45 year old women have a higher likelihood of telling him to shove his demands up his ass than a 25 year old woman does, so he doesn't date 45 year old women.”
We’ll not the dogs at lunch time but she does balance our toddler lunch and working from home. But I get your point lol.
I’m willing to be as helpful as I need to be. But it’s difficult for me to take the wheel when she won’t give me the wheel. You know? Her idea of taking a load off is to go on her phone uninterrupted which she’s entitled to. But it’s hard for me and the toddler to pretend she’s not around when she does that. Like the toddle is obviously gonna call for her to play if she’s right there.
I do like your idea of her just going to walk a craft store. Because at least then she’s alone mentally and not in the way (sounds harsh but that’s how it feels)
Updateme!
Different positions may feel better. Just as there may be a position that feels amazing to you but gives him very little stimulation.
He could've worded it better but I'm sure he didn't mean it in a negative way
I believe I love him and I said yes to him when he proposed to me so I’m hoping a lifetime. But I’m just naturally scared
This comment makes me wanna cry, please reevaluate your lack of empathy.
May be sleeping in different beds and talk to a doctor
I texted her and gave it to her straight. I’m gonna explain my emotions and we’re gonna have a nice little chat about boundaries and validity in the near future.
Wow, I didn't realise it was this bad. Thank you for being straight forward, I really needed it! I've been living in the bubble of hoping things magically change somehow.
Hell, if that were true, they'd be hijacking his accounts to try to scam other people with the vitamins. Not this shit.
This. Nobody hacks a tinder account and only uses it to flirt with people. Anyone who hacked his account would be using it to try and scam whoever they matched with.
It was normal, but he’s been telling me about them with very little notice, 1-2 weeks advance even though these are annual events. He’s also been working late, not crazy late but maybe 30-45 minutes late daily, long enough to bang a coworker or meet a girl in the city he works in at a hotel/her place. We share location but conveniently his phone doesn’t have good service in the city he works in. His name always says “No location found” and shows that it’s loading, even when we are in the same house. He is tech savvy, so I have never liked that my location is always visible but he is “not found,” like maybe he sabotaged it. He’s also been critical of me lately and poking fun at me even though he knows I don’t like “playful” insults, I really don’t fuck around with that, I think it’s immature bullshit and not lighthearted at all. I also found one of those calculator apps that hides shit several months ago, I called him on it and he immediately opened it and offered me to look at it. I think I told him to delete it. I might check and see if it’s still on his phone tonight. I’m stressed because I’m like in love with this guy. I keep looking up wedding venues and dreaming about having kids with him. I have never been this suspicious of someone cheating before, although I do watch out for it. I cheated once in the past, I drunkenly kissed someone else once while I was with my ex and I feel like this may be Karmic justice for that ? I have NEVER cheated don him though, there has been nothing throughout the course of our relationship that I’ve done that would remotely be considered close to cheating. To top it all off, I just sold my place to live with him at his house in a different city and I’m scared that i’ll be packing up my stuff and moving out already.
It was normal, but he’s been telling me about them with very little notice, 1-2 weeks advance even though these are annual events. He’s also been working late, not crazy late but maybe 30-45 minutes late daily, long enough to bang a coworker or meet a girl in the city he works in at a hotel/her place. We share location but conveniently his phone doesn’t have good service in the city he works in. His name always says “No location found” and shows that it’s loading, even when we are in the same house. He is tech savvy, so I have never liked that my location is always visible but he is “not found,” like maybe he sabotaged it. He’s also been critical of me lately and poking fun at me even though he knows I don’t like “playful” insults, I really don’t fuck around with that, I think it’s immature bullshit and not lighthearted at all. I also found one of those calculator apps that hides shit several months ago, I called him on it and he immediately opened it and offered me to look at it. I think I told him to delete it. I might check and see if it’s still on his phone tonight. I’m stressed because I’m like in love with this guy. I keep looking up wedding venues and dreaming about having kids with him. I have never been this suspicious of someone cheating before, although I do watch out for it. I cheated once in the past, I drunkenly kissed someone else once while I was with my ex and I feel like this may be Karmic justice for that ? I have NEVER cheated don him though, there has been nothing throughout the course of our relationship that I’ve done that would remotely be considered close to cheating. To top it all off, I just sold my place to live with him at his house in a different city and I’m scared that i’ll be packing up my stuff and moving out already.
never hurts to be clean
So, you let your assumptions cloud your judgment and were saying things that are factually untrue because you prefer to try to elicit anger rather than actually say the truth? Gotcha, cool talk
The social worker isn't going to give OP any info on this kid, if she even exists. They don't give out that sort of information, especially to an unrelated person. It would be a massive violation of her privacy. And if this girl does exist would hope that she wouldn't be placed with her mentally unstable mother and her boyfriend of a few months.
Honey, some of us just have a bad picker…
To me, that doesn't seem very different than the initial sharing of location (which would have been a major red flag to me already, but since that was agreed upon I don't see much of a difference).
But are you really okay with sharing your whereabouts all the time? That's nothing that builds trust. Instead it shows lack of trust.
you need to have a heart to heart talk with your husband. Let him read this post so that he can understand how hurt you truly feel.
Maybe i explain it bad. It wasnt a date. It was a party between many students. I do not have romantic interests for her. But thank you
We go a touch further. We treat their s/o’s like family. It’s made a huge difference with my son’s fiancée whose own family treated her like shit.
Honestly, you’re an asshole for saying she “manipulated” you and saying she was like her mother. Look at the world we are living in. I don’t blame her for not wanting to bring kids into it. She probably was pretty certain that she wanted kids before and just….grew up more and changed her mind. That’s not manipulation or a crime. Plenty of people have changes in their wants from their early 20s.
A difference in opinion on kids being a dealbreaker is absolutely fine and I would encourage you to leave if you want kids and she does not. But she reached out to you to have a dialogue about it and you just got up and left? That is absurd. I can understand the hurt and shock but this is your fiancé that you’ve been with for 5 years. She deserves more respect then you just walking out on her during serious talks about life.
Did you ever stop to ask WHY she was feeling that way? Maybe she’s feeling like you’re not helpful enough around the place now and can’t imagine adding more to her plate, maybe she’s just nervous about the state of the world, maybe she’s just really valuing the private time you guys have together, or maybe she’s scared of what a pregnancy would do to her body. It could be a million things and some might just require a little help and reassurance from you or for her to just have a little more time to think about it…and she may realize she was just having some anxiety and land back on wanting kids. But you didn’t give her a chance to explain ANYTHING or hear her out. Even if she solidly decided that she didn’t want kids and the relationship was understandably ending, that shouldn’t stop you from being a compassionate person to her?
And if one thing like this is enough to make you lash out and then abandon the conversation, you aren’t ready to be a dad. Because parenting is not easy and you will have to compromise and listen. To your wife AND children.
I promise you it never changes. Just get rid of him. Guys with poor hygiene cause all kinds of nasty issues with UTIs.
Perhaps you can offer her to stay until she has a place and help her look ?
How often do you text? It’s normal for couples to text several times during the day, I call my bf every day/every other day and it’s pretty balanced.
I’m not. When we dated we lived 5 min away from each other. Then because of life we moved in together too quickly and broke up. We have lived 8 hours away for the last 2 years. We have taken a break since all that and have improved a lot. The biggest problem now is just that we’re 8 hours away and neither of us are in the position to move. So with no end goal in sight, we had to admit that at some point we have to move on. So this is finally that time. As I said, we had a really understanding conversation about letting each other go right now. I did also say I don’t want to disrespect their relationship by talking still. It’s really a right person, wrong time scenario I believe.
YTA.
I will list your options, it can also help with your next relationship. I am a bit sad for her since you ended the relationship without doing the full research and condering the options that you can take, not just her.
I understand that you might feel helpless condering there are more options targeted towards women, hopefully the following list helps you to have more options:
Do in depth research about safety and costs. I used cycle tracking + discharge observations as my main method for years, it has a pearl-index of 0.4, similar to the pill (!). For this method, you don't have penetrative sex on the fertile days. If you add a condom and don't come in her (finish outside), you are as close to 100% safe as you can get.
You could also consider non piv sex (oral, roleplay, all kinds of touching etc) if you are that terrified even after adding cycle tracking + a condom. A copper iud is also great, if you are willing offer to pay, drive her etc. It has a similar safety to the pill or the temperature + discharge tracking, but you don't have to do anything. It can have some side effects and requires medical checksups to insure placement. But everything you ask is a effort or medical burden on any woman you are with, so please condider other options (non piv, coming outside+condom) if you are the one that requires that extra layer of safety. A good tip is also to avoid penetrative sex in the roughly 7 days around ovulation, these are the very fertile ones. Or make it a policy to not come into rhe condoms on these days, come outside.
exactly!
Exactly. As kids, sometimes you do duke it out, but even then, it's a parent's job to intervene and teach you that that's not the acceptable way to solve your problems. This poor kid obviously had no one do that for her, which is sad, but doesn't make this any less unacceptable. Lack of parenting doesn't give one an excuse to be a tyrant in society. This girl is essentially an overgrown toddler with her emotional regulation.
Therapy is an excellent tool for everyone. Don’t destroy this guy. I think you are being harder on him than is necessary. He seems caring and loving, and open to being a better partner to OP. I definitely agree OP needs to take her time and make sure these issues get sorted out.
You don’t even have to address genitals. Just say stuff like “wow your forehead’s getting a bit bigger, maybe a bit of a receding hairline”. “Don’t wear a ball cap your hair is thin enough you don’t want to lose more hair”.
That's part of the manipulation.
Awe thank you!!!!
Chapstick.
Oooooo, such a big expense!
LEAVE HER ALONE!
You admit this is all your fault (followed by excuses and more excuses). She doesn't OWE you “an explanation”. You already know exactly why she's fed up with your sh*t.
Leave her alone, learn the lesson, be a better person and a better bf for the next person! JFC!
There is a fundamental and irreconcilable opposition between being an alt-right, neoconservative anti-feminist and any version of the thought “my love can change him.” There's no coming back from this.
No one picks up radicalism as a “phase.” You either are so weak that your own philosophies towards other people are completely replaced by those around you, or the radical beliefs resonate with you so deeply that you adopt them without question. That's it, and personality, I would not choose to be with anyone from either category.
Too much porn can be a relationship killer. And no I'm not one of those nofap weirdos, that subreddit is a cult. I'm just speking practically. Excessive porn watching and masturbation sets someone's threshold for necessary sexual and physical stimulation to get off unrealistically high.
For sexual stimulation, people tend to see things in porn that are much more extreme than they're going to see in real life, especially the kind of porn your partner is watching. This will eventually desensitize him to things he would normally find arousing, like you. Hard to get excited about your girlfriend taking off her bra if you just watched violent barely legal gangbangs for hours. If this goes on long enough his lack of arousal with normal women in normal situations may lead to him thinking he's asexual when he's really just desensitized.
Secondly, there's the physical aspect. Someone masturbating is squeezing a hell of a lot harder and tighter than their partner could ever be. You could do Kegel exercises from now until the end of time and you're still not going to be as tight as his own fist with a death grip on himself. If he does that long enough and regularly then he won't feel much physical stimulation with you, which will lead to more of the exact same problems.
The solution in both cases is to take a break from the porn and let him re-sensitize himself to normal stimulation, both visually and physically. If he's not WILLING to do that then you have a completely different problem on your hands.
Also, this:
He won't give me oral either because cunnilingus gives him heartburn, which is the only other way I get off.
That's a new one. I'm no ENT doctor but I feel like there is proooooobably no medical basis for this claim. Hell, I've had problems with heartburn since I was a kid and I'm pretty sure going down on my wife has no effect on it whatsoever.
No doubt! In fact, I would go ahead and emphasize that I think it was pretty cruel of her to see her exhausted man, and decides this is the time to try to initiate sex, then try to shame him afterwards when he didn’t have the energy.