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Sandy Willis, 19 y.o.
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Online Live Sex Chat rooms Sandy Willis
Date: October 17, 2022
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It is very toxic to be comparing yourself to your new partner when you're two different complete people. The more you continue to compare yourself, the more you will end up resenting yourself and slowly resent her. You should talk to her about it or seek mental help about it. Because it'll end up helping you a lot with expressing these feelings and how you feel overall.
Don't compare yourself to someone who isn't you. When you want change, then prove it to yourself instead of sitting there comparing.
Yes I acknowledge where my actions seems to betray my resolve but at this point I know I won't make any moves but if she does, I know I will falter. We have to see each other because we already agreed to co parent our dogs by her coming to see them in my place till she moves out from her sister's place to her own. I want to seek the possibility of a neutral place like the dog park but I don't want to hurt her feelings by saying she can't come to my place to see them either, we didn't work out a schedule and it's not fair for me to deny her seeing them just because I don't feel comfortable.
I see you as having 2 choices. Just break up, or try couples counseling. You shouldn't stay in this relationship for life!
He is abusing you and he has no empathy for you losing your mother. Please leave him you deserve better weather you realize it or not
Sounds like you have a bigger issue than the AA meeting.
I’ve proded the topic carefully before and when I got nothing I did sit down with her. Which then led to one of our biggest arguments so I just let it go. She’s very adamant about not giving me a reason and I’m not sure why
Good riddance in my eyes tbh
This . He wants to be the best you ever had and his ego can't handle it. My husband bought me a vibrator for our 5th anniversary.
Let's bring in Hyperbole. If he said he wanted you to have sex with a cow, would you? No? Fantastic. Apply that boundary logic to everything else you want to say no to.
I've been trying to reassure her. Although this is the first time she's given the ultimatum, it isn't the first time we've spoken about this.
I wouldn't say you're wrong and she could feel that way but I'm not going anywhere and there are only so many ways I can articulate that and show that to her.
Perhaps you should listen to your friends, family, and co-workers. How can you trust she won't ditch you again and leave you this time with a mortgage or with children to raise? How can you give her a chance when she ditched you 3 years ago? This woman is a waste of your time and couldn't handle the hard stuff like you know “communication”? You are nuts to give her another chance. She made her choice , don't waste your time on someone completely unreliable like this. There are better people out there for you. Keep looking you'll find one.
Im sorry to hear that.Maybe it's a sign that the spark is gone…or maybe it will pass. But you can't force yourself not to think about it.
You are ruining your bf's physical snd mental health and you can't give a crap about it? You are an awful human being.
He's also pretty dumb for keeping your cheating ass arround, but hey, I'm pretty sure you also did your pretty share of manipulation to stay together.
Honestly, you should probably leave everyone alone.
No problem, if you don't mind, send me an update, either here or via Dm if you want to talk more.
If she really felt remorse why would she not come forward and admit to what she did? She hid this information for 10 years. He found out because her friend wanted revenge. That’s embarrassing that she not only cheated but her inner circle knew about it. Changed behavior is important but being honest and coming forward is part of that process. It seems like she’d never had told him if he wasn’t told.
When someone shits all over your affection and love for them, why would you want to?
That doesn’t really matter. What does is, she wasn’t getting what sure wanted and needed.
In other words, you were giving lots of energy, but not the kind she needed, like a person working very hard but not doing the job he’s paid to.
Nope, nope, no one can argue against you, yes we all know depression stops you from doing stuff, blah blah, but BROTHER, PISSING IN A BOTTLE?
For fucks sake you’re right that’s divorce worthy. I’m having the same reaction as you now. Christ that’s disgusting. And under the bed YOU SLEEP ON…
Dating for 8 months and engaged. And no normal 24 year old should be interesting in an 18 year old. You are young. You have a lot more living to do!
The title alone just makes me think “Thanks for the memories. Even though they weren't so great.”
I don't fully understand the whole work wife concept but from what I've gleaned from other people it is nothing like what your bf and her are doing, it is something that just gets labeled based on work/social interactions and very much tongue in cheek. They are crossing boundaries and essentially having or working up to an affair.
He needs to stop it now.
Inertia happens organically.
Great relationships happen when you put the effort in to have fun together so that it never feels like effort.
Just block him you are better with him out of your life. Do some things that make you happy go to the park or do some hobby you enjoy focus on making yourself happy don’t dwell on thoughts of him it will not help. Stay positive and know that you deserve way better then a asshole that cheats. You can do it.
I’m not assuming, I know by what he’s written and knowing how the German system works and how much you need to support a child?
She's cruel to only wear wool. The way the sheep are treated is horrible
Low him, not weight
Drugs. Im thinking hard drugs. Thats why the door HAS to be shut.
Theres something very fishy going on here.
No way its real. Its a bait xD
Stupid games/stupid prizes
“almost any couple” is a blanket statement that does not apply.
The general consensus of the replies in the post disagree with that. And OPs post points in the same direction. Why I generalized, and it applies as much or more than the logic line you're arguing. ?♂️
Communication is a key in any relationship. And yeah, people do it as surprises. OP said specifically it crossed the line into pornographic rather than simple boudoir. Again, that's a boundary that she chose to cross to try and “surprise” him with it maybe. And many people make this similar choice, I've had previous relationships where partners have done the same.
Some people aren't bothered when those things happen to their own benefit. As a law of averages, people are. And communication about those boundaries would prevent rolling the dice on a success or failure in a partner's reception.
Fuck me people can't be freaking obtuse. I'd divorce for even suggesting it let alone give you a chance at therapy. ” You're not enough that's why I want to fuck other people” is pretty much what he heard. 9/10 when someone in monogamous relationship suggest poly they either have someone in mind or is already seeing someone, so my trust would be gone and relationship without trust are meaningless to me.
His actions obviously are wrong, but I can't say I don't see the reason for it. If annulments are possible where you live that seems like the best solution. He should get way from his wife of 3 months that wants some side-dudes and you should get away from someone who verbally berates you.
A 23-year-old is immature, alert the presses
at the end of her rope?
Or she's just a bitch.
I can’t tell if your outraged or annoyed at me for being worried
You haven't had sex in 8 months. The relationship was done a few months ago.
Yes, hear her out. That does not mean that he stays in this relationship. It could be great closure for him, and an eye opener. Maybe even allow him to open his heart again to someone else instead of building walls. But only if she’s willing to own up to her BS. I don’t think she’s a good partner for him but he was asking for advice. And without knowing them personally that’s all I could give. I think reactions speak volumes in these situations. I hope she owns her stuff and has her own moment of realization that the way she’s treated this is so far from what a relationship is supposed to be.
You approach the situation by growing the fuck up.
It's a regular-ass diary, not just some personal, penthouse forum collection of her own exploits. She's allowed to record her own private thoughts about her life which includes her sex life.
Why does it matter at all to you? It has zero impact on your relationship.
I am calm lmao, how is me asking for advice not being calm. You sound a little agitated about someone else’s relationship maybe u should calm down ?
I am calm lmao, how is me asking for advice not being calm. You sound a little agitated about someone else’s relationship maybe u should calm down ?
He did not change. He is desperate to keep you and keep control of you. He will say and do anything to get you to stay. He will lie, he will love bomb, and then when you cave, he'll go back to his old ways. And the abuse will escalate.
do it. if these things matter more to you than being with him.
Good for you, just remember that at least this relationship thaught you what a toxicity looks like so you can be more selective in the future.
Why does it say 15 comments but there’s only 2?
I am committed to him. I love that fucking guy man. Raising a child even if it’s not yours will cause you to be attached. I show up to all his sports events and after school stuff . However im not his dad, that’s why his mother makes the final decision on everything regarding him
I also want to thank you for saying that you're not surprised it took me so long to notice. I've been struggling with that, feeling like there must have been some red flags that I overlooked, and yet I can't find any. I know I was likely blinded by love, but I just feel so damn silly for taking this long to realize that he has a sever problem. So thank you.
What consequences?
You are in a horribly dangerous situation. I know well-meaning people are going to tell you “just leave” and yes, you do need to leave but you need to protect yourself.
I’ve known two men who served time in prison on wrongful convictions on account of a woman’s false testimony. Your wife is a loose cannon and her history of violence demonstrates that she is capable of pretty much anything, especially if she does it right in front of your kids. You may find yourself in a situation where you are forced to defend yourself to save your own life and how is that going to be perceived in court? Or, she could actually kill you or turn her wrath on your kids. You do not have the luxury of sticking around because you love her and want her to change.
You also don’t want your kids to grow up thinking this is okay or “normal” and take it from someone who grew up in a house with domestic violence, this absolutely will traumatize your kids. Damage has been done already. Trauma causes lifelong, life threatening issues that can at least be mitigated if you take action now.
Call an attorney, tell them everything that has been happening and not only file for divorce but make sure you get sole custody of your kids and supervised visitation for the mother. You may have to make a police report in order for this to happen. Don’t give her any heads up as to what you plan to do, you don’t want her to beat you to the punch and change the narrative.
Your kids deserve better and so do you. I wish you the best.
I'm glad you are getting snipped. You shouldn't have fathered 4 kids.
I feel sorry for the kids.