So, its easy to suspect the worst and think that she cheated. A new dress for a big night out isn't suspicious at all. Getting plastered with her friends wasnt totally unexpected. A bunch of girls heading back to an apartment isnt the most unusual thing in the world either. If she was so drunk she forgot her jacket and purse that kinda backs up her story because she wouldn't have left it behind if she had stayed in the apartment that night. She left it because she didnt really know where it was when she woke up on a couch. Its completely possible she cheated in her drunken state with a guy, but I'm not seeing premeditated cheating and if she hasn't given you reason to suspect her before, why now?
As for the lack of messaging? A little inconsiderate since she said she would, but she was consistent. She didn't leave you hanging by stopping halfway through the evening. She consistently didn't text at all. But you also knew where she was and what she was doing. What really was the point of the messaging when she was safe with friends?
My biggest concern is being drunk and asleep in a supposedly public accessible area. Where were the friends? You do say “they” got a cab home and if she didn't have her purse, someone else must have paid?
I'd be pretty pissed because the end of the evening sounds dangerous and over the top with the alcohol. Its good she got home safe but there really needs to be a better plan especially if she was meant to come home to your place that night.
There is nothing more aggrevating than a partner who is entirely passive and communicates by reading between the lines.
You're literally married, you obviously already had a sex life with him beforehand so why are you surprised now?
Yes SOME guys do feel pressure to not initiate sex every 5 minutes because we don't want our partners to feel like they're just good for sex. But not all guys have a high libido like that.
You cannot be scared of rejection at this point. If you feel dejected he's not initiating more, how do you think he feels when YOU never initiate? It goes both ways. He might be feeling unwanted or unattractive or just plain feels like you're not interested so he's backing off. you never know unless you talk. STOP habitually trying to “read the signs” of his interest and ASK him directly, but gently.
No. I wouldn't do that even if she were an awesome, healthy mother.
But your mother sounds manipulative and toxic and I'm assuming there is a good reason she didn't have custody of you for that long. Also her partner just got out of rehab. I really don't think they would be a great environment for a child.
I'm confused though. Did your friends and family not say what everyone here is saying? Because if anyone told you that you should do this with some load of bs about “family”, they're pretty bad too.
Instead of approaching it as what he did wrong maybe try drawing a firmer line on the “division of labor” front. “I love that you do all the cooking and spoil me with great meals so I really want to handle all the laundry so I feel useful”. It is a fact that some cohabiters will intentionally mess things up just to get out of ever being asked to do that task again. But if he's sincere in thinking he's helping you just make it clear that the laundry room is your domain and yours alone.
So, its easy to suspect the worst and think that she cheated. A new dress for a big night out isn't suspicious at all. Getting plastered with her friends wasnt totally unexpected. A bunch of girls heading back to an apartment isnt the most unusual thing in the world either. If she was so drunk she forgot her jacket and purse that kinda backs up her story because she wouldn't have left it behind if she had stayed in the apartment that night. She left it because she didnt really know where it was when she woke up on a couch. Its completely possible she cheated in her drunken state with a guy, but I'm not seeing premeditated cheating and if she hasn't given you reason to suspect her before, why now?
As for the lack of messaging? A little inconsiderate since she said she would, but she was consistent. She didn't leave you hanging by stopping halfway through the evening. She consistently didn't text at all. But you also knew where she was and what she was doing. What really was the point of the messaging when she was safe with friends?
My biggest concern is being drunk and asleep in a supposedly public accessible area. Where were the friends? You do say “they” got a cab home and if she didn't have her purse, someone else must have paid?
I'd be pretty pissed because the end of the evening sounds dangerous and over the top with the alcohol. Its good she got home safe but there really needs to be a better plan especially if she was meant to come home to your place that night.
There is nothing more aggrevating than a partner who is entirely passive and communicates by reading between the lines.
You're literally married, you obviously already had a sex life with him beforehand so why are you surprised now?
Yes SOME guys do feel pressure to not initiate sex every 5 minutes because we don't want our partners to feel like they're just good for sex. But not all guys have a high libido like that.
You cannot be scared of rejection at this point. If you feel dejected he's not initiating more, how do you think he feels when YOU never initiate? It goes both ways. He might be feeling unwanted or unattractive or just plain feels like you're not interested so he's backing off. you never know unless you talk. STOP habitually trying to “read the signs” of his interest and ASK him directly, but gently.
You’re right. Cheers.
That’s not sensitivity, that’s irrational insecurity and misogyny.
Why is it so painful that someone else had been with his woman? Because he thinks she belongs to him.
No. I wouldn't do that even if she were an awesome, healthy mother.
But your mother sounds manipulative and toxic and I'm assuming there is a good reason she didn't have custody of you for that long. Also her partner just got out of rehab. I really don't think they would be a great environment for a child.
I'm confused though. Did your friends and family not say what everyone here is saying? Because if anyone told you that you should do this with some load of bs about “family”, they're pretty bad too.
Your bf just watched Anchorman for the first time. But he makes a TERRIBLE Ron Burgundy.
There's a difference between a hysterectomy and getting your tubes tied.
Instead of approaching it as what he did wrong maybe try drawing a firmer line on the “division of labor” front. “I love that you do all the cooking and spoil me with great meals so I really want to handle all the laundry so I feel useful”. It is a fact that some cohabiters will intentionally mess things up just to get out of ever being asked to do that task again. But if he's sincere in thinking he's helping you just make it clear that the laundry room is your domain and yours alone.
For starters, the balcony is outside