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Room for online sex video chat Lucy_Ember
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Languages: en,fr,es
Birth Date: 2002-03-27
Body Type: bodyTypeCurvy
Ethnicity: ethnicityWhite
Hair color: hairColorBlonde
Eyes color: eyeColorBlue
Subculture: subcultureStudent
Date: November 23, 2022
In my family, we kiss on the mouth. Nothing weird about it. If someone is sick we switch to cheek or forehead. I can't believe you are worried about herpes from him kissing his mom, aunt or grandma. That's what's sick to me.
I think there’s room here for you to think about some of this differently.
Most people don’t have to deal with suicide of someone very close to them so, identifying the signs at the time CAN be difficult and expecting yourself to have noticed them isn’t realistic. Also, happiness is a choice. It’s not guaranteed to anyone and it’s a decision and skill you have to build and exercise. Other people can’t make you happy. Humans being unhappy is NOT a sign of potential suicide. It’s part of being human. I believe there was much more going on that you probably didn’t know about your ex. Especially since you were apart at the time of the suicide.
Also, keep in mind that people mourn differently and people also mourn differently each instance of mourning. The family may change their mind and you may also change your mind about the note.
There is no “grief Olympics”. It’s not a competition and you can’t compare your grief to someone else’s. You DEFINITELY can’t compare your grief as an ex, to a parent’s grief. No parent expects to lose a child, they expect to be gone first. Focus on healing yourself, and when you feel like you can, offer support to the family. But, take care of yourself, work through your grief and don’t worry about the note, that’s not what’s important.
That all came in after. My initial post to OP addressed his position, and his position, only.
I find it fascinating that no one is outraged by this girl. Imagine the roles were reversed, and he dumped her because “looking at her brown skin made him feel ‘ick,’ and he wants to be with someone white so his family will approve.” That is racist, and it is despicable.
That being said… OP, you definitely dodged a bullet. But, as others have said, learn from this and don’t date coworkers anymore.
So if I would ask him to not talk to his ex I am crossing a line?
I don't think I can answer that for you. For me? Yes, 100% would be met with a “my friends are mine to pick, your welcome to ask but they are my friend and will continue to be”. Your partner and you might feel differently. I would ask this though, if he asked you to stop talking to your best friend for w/e reason, would you feel okay doing that right now? Even if the reason wasn't something you agreed with? Just introspect there a bit.
But I don’t see why he would still talk to her, they don’t have kids etc.
Could be any of a million reasons. Relationships to me are like friendships, at least at their foundational level. A relationship can end and I can still be their friend. I am friends with several of my exs. They are close to me, and they know me much better than most of my other friends.
I always hear: when a guys talks to his ex: red flag.
That statement is itself a red flag to me. Why are they generalizing? Why are they trying to assert control over a relationship that isn't theirs? Every situation is different, its really up to how him and you feel and what works for the two of you. If he agrees its not okay to talk to his ex, then awesome! You two are a good pair! But if he disagrees? Well, it's his life, not yours.
He did say that if it’s bothering me that he would stop contacting because he understands that it would make me uncomfortable.
If he offers, feel free to accept on that. I would suggest talking about it a lot, but it's healthy to work together on this!
Just tell him to fuck right off, the presumptuous arsehole!