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Room for online sex video chat lizzy_squirt
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Date: October 11, 2022
Are you sure her boyfriend said he was fine with an open relationship? Have you ever met him? Talked to him? Because her “backing out last minute” makes me suspicious that she didn't actually tell him anything and is just cheating on him with you and had to back out because he got suspicious or something along those lines.
Regardless, I think you should move on. It sounds like you bonded with her in a time when you were vulnerable and latched onto her because she's comfortable and likes all the stuff you like. Its only been a month and she's flaked on you twice. Move on and spend some time alone.
They sound 15.
I would not feel comfortable with that person. Hell na, especially if u barely into sex in the first place. Consent is sexy
?
If my back is itchy, I don't avoid scratching it just because my wife's back seldom itches.
Masturbation is an important part of self care for most people. It also lowers our risk of prostate cancer.
I agree with the other poster, I think a bit of sex therapy would be good for you guys.
You are not married so why buy a house together? It would create lots of problems (e.g. if you split up, nobody can force the other to sell the house).
Maybe you have to tell him that if you marry, you'd prefer to buy a home together, so that instead for looking for a “family home” he could look for an investment property (something he can rent out if you guys marry and move to a home w/kids).
That said, I find it weird that he doesn't want to talk about finances. You cannot marry if you don't openly talk about each others finances.
Get him fired, just because she always deals with it doesn't make it okay
Leave immediately.
First off, he has shown signs and a past of violence. He will be abusive at some point outside the bedroom, he has accidentally warned you of that multiple times now. The choking was one thing, but to humilate you in front of your friends with threats of violence, that isn't normal although he thinks it is.
Second, he is already pushing you out the door. He has done everything in his power to avoid spending time with you, help him out and walk through that door.
If you stay, you will likely get hurt both emotionally and physically. Get out before it's too late.
He is showing you who he is. He does not have compassion for your younger self in a very tough position making a difficult decision. He doesn't have compassion for the person you are now, either. There is nothing you can do to change the past and it is really clear that he holds it against you – and that is unlikely to change.
4 months is a short relationship. He is showing the red flags. He sees you are damaged, flawed, and questionable. This is not a solid foundation for a relationship.
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OP, I don't see why you're so stubborn. People have given you plenty of feedback yet to refuse to face reality.
No matter where she even got the idea from, now it is there. You stated she's been pestering you (pressuring and disrespecting you) about being close-minded (you're not. Those are valide opinions and values).
From here, no matter what she says about what she wants regarding breaking up because she can't even respect your views on an open relationship, you either stand firm by your values and hope that she stops this idea (this might just lead to cheating as other have pointed out left and right). Or, you can break up and find someone who shares the same values, doesn't change your (both) meaning of what a loving relationship all of a sudden, and doesn't gaslight you to make you go against your values.
And stop wasting people's time. You're coming up with excuses for very useful advice only to remain in denial.
Idiot.
Yeah, he's hella weird. Makes me think of Leonardo DiCaprio.
You were assaulted. Same thing happened to me with a guy I thought I was longtime friends with.
To answer your question, it’s 100% inappropriate and (in my opinion) absolutely unforgivable. Totally up to you how to proceed. For me, I publicly called the guy out and my life was promptly ruined over doing so. I lost my job, my home, and a lot of friends. If you choose to out the guy, be prepared for very quickly realizing who your real friends are. If you choose not to, please consider talking to a therapist about this. I don’t even know if you could file a police report but speaking from my experiences I would recommend against it.
I would definitely tell a few of the closest/most trusted friends, as they should know what kind of person is being invited to stay at their houses and hang out in the friend group, but that’s also totally up to you. He’s young and this type of behavior is HUGE red flags for the future.
I know what u meant I am just saying why people are “taking it too seriously” different strokes for different folks. I would probably laugh too but it’s understandable why it’s awkward now. Also this sun is for giving advice so they aren’t judging but more so giving their opinions on why his dad reacted the way he did.
Never buy a house BEFORE getting married. That's just dumb. Buying a house after marriage protects both parties.
I’m trying not to be judge mental here. With that said, let’s boil this down to syrup. If your wife was a single mom the conventional (and to my mind, correct) advice is to not bring the guy you are dating around until you are serious.
In this case you are bringing around the less serious “fun” relationship around your daughter and hoping she doesn’t get attached. This is madness.
I’m trying not to be judge mental here. With that said, let’s boil this down to syrup. If your wife was a single mom the conventional (and to my mind, correct) advice is to not bring the guy you are dating around until you are serious.
In this case you are bringing around the less serious “fun” relationship around your daughter and hoping she doesn’t get attached. This is madness.
…Why would the question be about your life in general when the conversation is about her specific reactions in a relationship context? I'm lost.
Yawn.
Talk to him about this. My husband and I switch positions every 2nd day because otherwise it feels “looser”. Its not always about the face. Just talk to him about it, tell him how you feel. Be open and honest, but do not start accusing him of things before you know how things stand.
Bro just don’t tell her. And get over it on your own. This is a YOU problem. Not a HER problem; not a WE problem.
If you decide on telling her tho, think it through. She just met you, and knows nothing about you and suddenly she’s told by you that you went thru her phone and read her messages and now are guilt ridden.
Bro, what that’s says about you is that you are not trustworthy, you yourself have trust issues, and you don’t respect her privacy. Hell, that’s a sure shot break up right there.
If you feel the way you feel about her, take it as a life lesson and don’t go snooping on your partners phone, try to trust them. If you are afraid they will make a fool out of you, then let it be, that will Be you life experience going forward bro.
This is a rabbit hole, trust me, you don’t want to go into, it’s never ending.
Do NOT ditch your own graduation. Period.
It was, but honestly I think I’m mainly upset because I was looking forward to living with her. But yeah I should still probably move out
I'm sorry. From reading all the remarks from other people, it doesn't seem like you are getting your original question answered.
What you need to do is write a letter to him expressing all your concerns. Emphasize how much you love him but these concerns you have are very disturbing to you and you need his help to clear these concerns up.
I wish you luck and God Bless you.
Please have some empathy for his situation, whether you want to see him again or not. By you being kind, reaching out just to say you hope he is okay, might be enough to keep him from being permanently traumatized.
Lol oh man that comment gave me a giggle. I’d do the same.
Bro, your girl felt extremely uncomfortable in that situation and you even said she was pressured by her fiend and this dude at the same time. If you are asking if this is redeemable instead of making her feel safe with you then you are wrong. She came to you after she was out of the situation to let you know immediately what happened. She didn’t communicate with her phone or socials with the dude and you are on here asking if you should forgive her or not? How about you ask yourself what can be done to prevent or avoid something like this in the future instead of recriminating her for a situation she was forced into. Also, her friend needs a damn talking to. How the hell is she gonna try to pimp your girl out for a fucking shot and you are more upset with your girl than her?
Umm, Why are you dating a 20 y.o? Don’t date a 20 year old if you don’t want to go through 20 y.o bullshit. You’re at two different points in your life, I honestly don’t know what else you expected, not saying it’s right, just saying why are you acting shocked?
This is exactly what a 20 year old girl does. She’s just started to gain her freedom, just wait till she turns 21. You aren’t going to limit her freedom and restrict her from going to bars, she will go behind your back. She’s already doing that. You deserve a dunce cap tbh. Because you should have called this a mile away.
Don’t date an immature person if you aren’t ready to handle immature games, and it’s weird you’re 25 wanting to date a 20 y.o. anyways, this is a big age gap for her age right now. You have already experienced your early 20’s, she’s just going through them. Clearly she intends on having her experiences as well, instead of trying to put her on a leash, how about this clearly is not a good relationship or at least not the right time to have one with her.
Here, you dropped this ?
I cannot believe that you’ve had unprotected sex for a year and not gotten pregnant. That’s crazy luck. I highly recommend you not push that luck any longer. Be firm with your gf on not wanting to have u protected sex PLEASE. You’re doing both of you and that possible accidental baby a favor. Idk why or how you made it a year with no accidents on such ignorance regarding sexual health and safety, but this is a nonstarter for not having kids; you MUST use protection. Preferably multiple kinds.
It sounds like your gf wants a baby. I think you need to have a serious conversation about that. This is too serious an issue to cave in about or ignore or let slide man.
I don’t comment on Reddit very often, but let me frank with you FIGHT FOR YOUR DAMN KIDS They’re your kids too and how dare you let her jeopardize your relationships with them.
Get your shit together and put your foot down, immediately. Why are you tiptoeing around the fact she is trying to steal your childrens’ relationship from you?
ABSOLUTELY UNACCEPTABLE BY BOTH OF YOU
They now have another sibling to rejoice and embrace and she’s tearing up the family because of something that was unintentional and a wonderful blessing. (All other crappy things aside) Everyone is right, get a lawyer and hammer her HARD with no. No to taking the kids, no to sharing custody, no to divorce. The answer is no.
I say this as someone who grew up without my dad around and it’s caused a LOT of problems for me that I’m just now coming to terms with through therapy. Do not for one second let those kids believe they are not the world to you, if ever there was a time to make a stink, this is it
Good luck to you and I hope she figures out that what she’s doing will harm her children and is completely selfish. Even if she doesn’t want to raise her stepson, this is an unacceptable outcome for your kids.
I don't think I've heard of someone celebrating months together after the first year. Crap, I don't think I've ever celebrated anything on a monthly basis ever.
This is a question for her, not us
Yup. I was voice texting and didn’t proofread. It was obviously a typo.
Stop asking for permission to be a stalker. She asked you to leave her alone so stop harassing her and leave her alone. If you actually care about her you shouldn't have to harass her to get your point across.
Exactly. When “political views” mean literal life and death and basic human rights they aren’t just opinions- they are ethics and morals.
And ask yourself, you stay with him. You have children. That child turns out to be a queer trans person what then? Suddenly it’s not just politics is it?
But even if we set that aside, he has so Leela respect for you that he happily participated in “debates” with you where he rips you apart (dismisses your thoughts, has no desire to actual heart and consider, etc) and when you don’t start as “calm” as him he implies he’s better than you.
Do you know what my husband and I do when we have a difference of opinion, we jokingly bicker back and forth and if one of us seems to be getting upset we stop. Because when you respect and care about your partner you don’t get off to treating them the way an Internet troll would.
If I told you the first and most important measure of love was respect, would you say how he treats you in these situations demonstrates that he loves and respects you?
But all that aside. You don’t need permission to break up with someone. No one – not even the person you are leaving – needs to agree that your reasons for ending the relationship are valid. If you aren’t happy, if this isn’t working, I’d the timing isn’t right, if you can’t see you gelling in the future – you get to leave.
And I’m sorry, to him your political differences don’t impact the relationship… Because your political opinions aren’t putting him, his future children or the things he cares about in any risk for harm. And more importantly because he doesn’t respect your opinion or take you or it seriously (he totally gives “little girl you and your ideas are so cute” vibes) to him it’s just things you say with no real impact because your opinion has no impact compared to his Rightness.
But from your perspective his opinions absolutely DO impact the relationship. Your experiences in the relationship aren’t the same he didn’t get to tell you whether your experience is real or valid or not. Only you do.
And only you get to decide if this is working for you. Is it working? Are you happy? Do you feel loved and respected? Do you feel if you got pregnant and needed an abortion you’d be safe with your partner? If you had a Queer child/sibling would they feel safe in your household?
Only you get to decide if you want to break up with someone. You can do it because you don’t like the color of his socks, and even if we all think that’s ridiculous and judgemental we can’t stop you from leaving him. Do what’s right for you.
Honey leave. He is being abusive. He is purposely trying to isolate you. He already isolated you from your friends and family. He made sure you didn’t finish your degree and made sure you missed all of those opportunities. Now he is trying to get you fired from work so you will be completely dependent on him and then lower your self esteem by making you feel like it’s your fault you got fired. You don’t feel like he is suffocating you he is doing it. The only thing your doing wrong is that your not leaving him. But he is a horrible husband and person. If he is this controlling with you imagine what’s going to happen if you have kids with him?