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Date: November 5, 2022
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Unfortunately you won’t know that if you’re both saving yourselves for marriage.
And if you are craving outward affection and she’s not doing that, she’ll likely never do that. You have to consider ending this and finding someone who more aligns with your values and wants.
please don't stay with someone who doesn't respect you. It won't get better after this. He lied and lied and lied until you had facts (the bar location) in his face. He probably deletes messages and this isn't probably the first time anything has happened. You even mentioned he threw low blows at you during the argument when you confronted him initially. He seems like a selfish, disrespectful partner and you deserve better. Good luck!
This man is abusive weather u want to admit it or not. He hurt u and your child (regardless if the child was an unintentional hit) and his actions are volatile.
Then hire a divorce lawyer, and get a paternity test ordered by the courts
I think you need to realize that he won’t understand your pain or empathize with it the way you want him to. You keep trying to learn how to do it in a way he will understand – I think you should instead shift your mindset to, he will not understand, and how he is treating you will continue and never change. He even said he is not sorry! With that acceptance, you will need to decide if this treatment is what you want forever. I think you deserve better.
Hell to the yes. I had an ex that did this (tried to barge in on me all the time in the bathroom) and his juvenile attitude to my boundaries was an utter turn off. Plus he would turn around and be like, 'oh, common, you love it.' Shocker: he trampled over other boundaries and was an ex shortly after.
things were going to get better if I put in more effort.
Her issues require her to step up, not you. You aren't a therapist. Thinking you can fix your partner is a common thing people in their 20's get stuck in, luckily you're almost out of that decade.
Jesus man, this just gets worse and worse. Even ignoring the first points which might be bigger deals, there’s three things here that need to be addressed.
First, you may have overreacted to the situation with the kids? I honestly think you underreacted, because unless you left out important context, you didn’t once mention what you said to her about the situation at hand other than to say you were going home given what you saw, and that her response was wanting to stay. That’s nuts on her part.
Second, listen, I’m truly sorry about your father. I can’t imagine. But her being busy with work driving you into depression? How are you addressing your depression?
Finally, the kids’ ages. I don’t really think it’s crazy that the 16 year old was left in charge for the night out over a few kids 10 and above. But was she actually watching them? Are we also just going to completely ignore what you saw?
The second part to that situation is related to the earlier context involving your ex. Your two girls at 10 wandered into town alone. By pure happenstance your ex sees them, and “detains” them. Your ex is supposed to be crazy for that? Any logical parent would be furious about it. So you’re not exactly perfect here either.
I know, that’s why I continue to just be social and live my life but I want to help her and idk how. I feel like a lot of it has to do with her insecurities :/
Then that's a big nope. Big NOPE ?
I came here just to see this!
WHAT?
What a strange answer.
People keep their cremated pets ashes. Why can't OP keep their fur?
My dad used to collect milk and sugar for my mom wherever he had coffee. Why can't she do that?
I do hate too much gas in my water/ drinks. Some I do shake to get it less gassy. Where is the need to see a therapist?????? I know others doing so, too. Nothing weird there.
Are you that ghosting guy himself?
Sure. But that's not exactly healthy is it.
17 years ago I was only 11. Do the math for mine and yourself so you feel like a jealous old hag damn near past her prime: So that makes him 22 & you 19, and you probably know how horny kids are. She clearly didn't, and still doest want him.Together for 2 years, at 36 you're that insecure? You sound like a cunt tbh
Good luck!! Hope it goes well! Update us!
Won’t she see him again next time she goes? Probably better to nip it in the bud, but if she doesn’t think she’ll see him again then it makes sense
Your post makes you sound both selfish and unreasonable. Read it. You are trying to force your fiance to do something he is not comfortable with. What would you call that?