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Agreed. That’s why I wrote what I wrote
Let’s be realistic here – and before anyone starts, I’m not justifying this rationale – if gf breaks up with OP it’s gonna be because she’s been turned off by the fact OP got held down and hickey’d by another man and physically couldn’t do shit about it.
Aside from the ick factor, it’s a stone cold fact that thoughts of him being unable to defend her are running through her head after hearing this sordid tale lol
Your mom needs to tell you who your father is. Not your dad. You have a true dad. But your biological family. You may have a parent that doesn’t know you exist
Your mom really ruined a lot of people
Carrying that level of credit card debt every month is itself a bad decision. You should bring that level down as rapidly as possible, because credit cards typically have a fairly high interest rate. You didn't mention how much your student loans are or what rate they carry.
It is in fact irresponsible to take an overseas trip and acquire a pet if you are in substantial debt.
Explaining that this is a common problem is not likely to impress your boyfriend. And I don't even think that he's being judgmental. 700 is not a great credit rating, mine is 820. You are no doubt paying a higher interest rate based on your credit rating.
Instead of taking that tack, you should say you recognize you have made mistakes and you need to learn more about personal finance. Tell him that you will both read a book on the subject (ask if he can recommend one) as well as meet with a personal banker to chart a course.
One of the smartest things you can do is have an automatic payment toward your debts made from your bank account as soon as your paycheck is deposited, and don't incur any more debt that month. This might require you going to a cash basis. Other big money sinks are consumer spending (clothes and other nonessential buys) and going out to lunch at work instead of taking your own.
Is SHE having an affair? I don’t know how many times someone accuses someone of doing the exact thing they are guilty of.