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Heidi Knight, 27 y.o.
Location: United States
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Online Live Sex Chat rooms Heidi Knight
Date: January 9, 2023
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The thing that's also very telling is that he's only concerned about another guy snatching his wife while he sees her being with another woman solely as a performative act for his pleasure.
I think you should put distance between you. Miscarriage or not if she doesn't love you, you should leave her. While it was unfortunate that you have woken her up, she really needs to apologise to you for her words, if you are to be together.
Don't just put yourself down for her. You tried to be there fir only to gear she doesn't love. Put distance between and leave the initiative to her what to do with it. If it remains broken for prolonged time yoy should brak up with her.
Sounds like it's time to give him some time frames to work towards and if he doesn't make an effort it's time to walk away.
You say he's not motivated to find a therapist so maybe book him some appointments with a handful so he can find one he gets on with. Do virtual therapy or take him to the appointments like he is a child. He's not going to do it himself and you need to accept that.
Then you say to him something like “you've got 6 months to put more effort into our relationship and your mental health or I'm out”. And you stick to it. It gets to month 5 and he's made no progress? Start packing and looking for somewhere to live. Do it in front of him. Show him you are serious.
If that doesn't work follow through and leave. You're too young to stay in a relationship like this. You can only do so much to help someone, at the end of the day they have to want to help themselves too.
No posh wank comments yet?
Not the best subreddit for this but take charge. He is nervous about doing it somewhere more public don't care we are doing it. Don't ask, tell. His pleasure comes second. BUT you have to talk and set up boundaries and safe words before you start doing this kind of stuff. Mostly its take charge and be assertive then go from there.
Agreed. Wasted my time with someone like that and it will not change until the person decides to. It’s best not to wait for change.
Bro don’t confront her over text. This is in person. Make her lie to your face. If she isn’t cheating on you know it seems at the very least she likes attention. The bumble thing is highly suspect. You are barely in a relationship it seems. So at best she is playing the field still. You are not on the same page.
Most importantly. There is absolutely no way she would tell you she is cheating until after she did at best. It would be more akin to her probably not even trying to hide it anymore at first then leaving. It’s over. No way that app should be frequently used.
I have a better perspective of your stance I guess.
I do want to add that if it was from abuse, that's even more reason speculation on it could do more harm than good. It's a scar that stands out, he knows you see it, but no abuse victim wants the thought that thier scars blatantly present what was done to them
My wife’s rule is “no touching.” (With a very big PERIOD). It’s a very simple and effective rule. I know clearly where her rule is. Anything beyond that is on me and I know the consequences.
Is he getting help or just not doing it anymore?
Boy bye
I haven't even thought about that. But yeah, I guess that is the only thing that makes sense. Why else would you want to be “exclusive” but not say it? Like… “Sleep with me only, but don't tell anyone”. It is strange.
I haven't even thought about that. But yeah, I guess that is the only thing that makes sense. Why else would you want to be “exclusive” but not say it? Like… “Sleep with me only, but don't tell anyone”. It is strange.
Imaging staying in this relationship: you will never get rid of her because they're “friends since 2 years”…
I haven't even think of that. I'm going to check all that, but I'll definitely be moving out if it's not considered abandoning the marital home.
I haven't even think of that. I'm going to check all that, but I'll definitely be moving out if it's not considered abandoning the marital home.
it's better to regret not having kids than having them and regretting it and resenting them. kids can tell, no matter how much you try to hide it.
not saying this is the case for you, but my point is everyone is different. just because you find it fulfilling doesn't mean everyone else will.
good luck
I squiggle away around the 30 minute mark if my partner isn’t moving and/or obviously asleep.
THIS! I regret so much telling my cousin my problems with my ex/other romantic relationships. She would start to hate them to the point where it was affecting my relationships. I constantly had her nagging in the back of my head and all the red flags she saw even if I didn’t consider them a big deal. Now I tell her nothing.
No, you feel like he’s using you. If you didn’t, you wouldn’t be keeping score.
Date someone else.
This is so weird. He apparently feels like cats are disposable but he agreed to take on 2 cats that weren't his. And he gets super upset about your cat starting harmless fights with one of his. I don't even know what to think. He has a very strange mindset about pets.
INFO: does he just want to put them outside for the night? Or is he talking about getting rid of them?
Do you even want this? It doesn’t sound like you do. You can say no. A threesome isn’t a normal birthday gift. It sounds like she wants it more than you do.
Please let us know you told him you were breaking up with him, and when he asked why you said “you’re a smart boy, figure it out.”
I know you can’t say that because it’s dumb, but tell us that anyway.
This sounds like something your wife wants to do (fuck her bff) and she’s wrapping it up as a ‘gift to you’. I’d follow your nerves on this.
There's no mental gymnastics other than the one's you're creating. She told you she doesn't want to date you, and isn't romantically or sexually attracted to you.
She talks to you because you continue to do so. Why shouldn't she? You're available on command. That doesn't change the fact that you've explicitly been told it's not happening. Wake up my guy.
You misspelled EX.
You are right. Thank you for your honesty
Id bail
so they got together at roughly 34 and 21. yeesh.
Please note that the silent treatment is a form of emotional abuse. It is very important to understand this.
Please take care of yourself. Practice a lot of self-care because your husband is a selfish person who is not helping you.
I think you strongly need to reconsider having kids with this person. If this is how he reacts now, how is he going to react if you have a sex aversion for a couple of years when your kids are babies / toddlers? It happens all the time.
What happens when you’re exhausted from motherhood and just not up to sex?
What happens if you or one of your children develops a major illness in the future that will take all of your time and energy? How will he react?
Once he has put his big boy pants on and us speaking to you again, you need to put these scenarios to him. And more.
Think through your options very, very carefully.
You’re 32, so you really want to waste your fucking time on a girl this selfish and disrespectful?
Get rid of her yesterday. Then she can flirt all she wants.
And? He saw a man’s name on a text and it made him so anxious, he had to look through (what he thought were) his wife’s text. That’s some pretty insecure behavior, whether he has permission to go through her phone or not.
Intimacy isn’t meant to be transactional. This isn’t love – it’s some weird, immature, unhealthy game you’re both playing.