Wedding date isn’t set yet, but looking at Dec 2023. Honestly it’s more because we are mid 30s and know we do want to settle down and have kids and are in the position to do so.
I don't know how old you are, but if you don't stand up for yourself, you are doomed to keep repeating this. She is a serious control freak with a double standard. You don't need Reddit to tell you this.
She needs to know that she has expectations to meet. It's okay for you to have them. Don't be afraid to make her unhappy. She needs to be unhappy about not getting the job done correctly.
I think he’s being pretty clear too. I asked him if we could please have a conversation about this, to which he let me know it would need to wait. When we get around to finally communicating, I’ll act accordingly based on what he says/does, but I’m worried his response will just be something along the lines of “you are a priority and you don’t get to speak for me on that. I understand that you feel otherwise though. I wish there was something I could do about that” and that will pretty much be it. In fact, I dread that response from him so much, as it leaves me literally nothing to work with.
At least now that my 10 week old son is here, we have something to talk about, when we do make conversation. She's very excited to be a grandma and likes to see him, which is good. It also means she's isn't going anywhere, so that doesn't make it easy for me ?.
You need to put things into perspective here; his wife is currently unknowingly living a lie while her husband disrespects her. That’s awful.
Further, you love this guy and want to tell him. But who do you love? You love a guy who you objectively know is unfaithful and can’t be trusted. So let’s say you tell him, he leaves her and you get together. Are you going to trust him?
Thanks for sharing! This sounds like me and my bf, but I am the higher libido partner, and we're still in our first year together. It's nice to hear that others have a similar dynamic to ours, and that it can work long term.
I think you've given OP a great window into a possible iteration of her current relationship – I hope she and her partner can work things out!
Yes, it’s too much. You shouldn’t have to make a rule for a grown ass man to give you undivided attention.
Throughout your entire post you’re making excuses for him. It’s his stressful job and he’s tired and on and on. If he’s too tired to show up in a relationship he shouldn’t be in one.
Wedding date isn’t set yet, but looking at Dec 2023. Honestly it’s more because we are mid 30s and know we do want to settle down and have kids and are in the position to do so.
I don't know how old you are, but if you don't stand up for yourself, you are doomed to keep repeating this. She is a serious control freak with a double standard. You don't need Reddit to tell you this.
Why does she get upset?
She needs to know that she has expectations to meet. It's okay for you to have them. Don't be afraid to make her unhappy. She needs to be unhappy about not getting the job done correctly.
I think he’s being pretty clear too. I asked him if we could please have a conversation about this, to which he let me know it would need to wait. When we get around to finally communicating, I’ll act accordingly based on what he says/does, but I’m worried his response will just be something along the lines of “you are a priority and you don’t get to speak for me on that. I understand that you feel otherwise though. I wish there was something I could do about that” and that will pretty much be it. In fact, I dread that response from him so much, as it leaves me literally nothing to work with.
At least now that my 10 week old son is here, we have something to talk about, when we do make conversation. She's very excited to be a grandma and likes to see him, which is good. It also means she's isn't going anywhere, so that doesn't make it easy for me ?.
Why are you even here lmaooo
Very good take. OP seems to feel very isolated and left alone.
There must be many people in his situation, though.
Who is paying for the wedding?
You need to put things into perspective here; his wife is currently unknowingly living a lie while her husband disrespects her. That’s awful.
Further, you love this guy and want to tell him. But who do you love? You love a guy who you objectively know is unfaithful and can’t be trusted. So let’s say you tell him, he leaves her and you get together. Are you going to trust him?
He got pulled out because of his own actions.
Thanks for sharing! This sounds like me and my bf, but I am the higher libido partner, and we're still in our first year together. It's nice to hear that others have a similar dynamic to ours, and that it can work long term.
I think you've given OP a great window into a possible iteration of her current relationship – I hope she and her partner can work things out!
Also, congrats on the soon-to-be-first-born!
Yes, it’s too much. You shouldn’t have to make a rule for a grown ass man to give you undivided attention.
Throughout your entire post you’re making excuses for him. It’s his stressful job and he’s tired and on and on. If he’s too tired to show up in a relationship he shouldn’t be in one.
Info: Is your wife pregnant as well? Is your SIL having twins?