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#anal #smalltits #young #teen * big squirt* [499 tokens remaining]
Date: November 25, 2022
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So your OK with him going when your there to supervise but not OK with him going when your not there. Seems double standards are at play here. You can't just be OK with it when it suits you. It's not fair on your fiancee having to try to guess when you'll be OK with it and when you won't be.
Don't know what to do?! I go by the Marie Kondo adage applied to relationships: If that person does not spark joy then I get rid of them.
Is this the kind of relationship you want? Why are you subjecting yourself to such behavior?
Not to be intrusive but how is your relationship with your husband now? Has he expressed remorse and give you an explanation
You don't need these kinds of headaches. Cut him loose.
as a married woman, I dont think you dud anything that bad.
I think your girlfriend is a scumbag tbh
as a married woman, I dont think you dud anything that bad.
I think your girlfriend is a scumbag tbh
as a married woman, I dont think you dud anything that bad.
I think your girlfriend is a scumbag tbh
I mean…you obviously don't love your wife as much as you say if you can betray her so easily.
As along as she is happy I don’t mind feeling guilty. I just don’t wanna hurt her.
Hell if I would have had tickets for a concert (not Taylor Swift) on any of my own college graduation days I would have skipped my own graduation. The best part of graduation days are the parties afterwards.
Sigma female grindset.
And how much do you contact your mom?
Yeah I’m well aware of that. Never said they couldn’t? I’m just questioning the claim that it’s the 3rd leading cause of cancer death.
My only concern would be, do I also have it. Symptoms don’t manifest right away. I am going to a party, there will be lots of people I can potentially get sick with whatever you have. You said it’s viral.
Also with my personality, I’d rather stay at home and take care of you.
Tbh, long distance relationship she has a point. U have nothing but communication. I’m sure u can spare half a minute to say ur home. Text or voice note, and that ur going to sleep.
You don’t have to be rude to people on here. You never know what’s going on in their lives. Learn to treat people with respect.
I literally have no confidence in myself.
I don’t know what to say in a confident way, I’d like to go out with him again if he finds himself moved back
I guess I’m thinking I’m leaving to snowboard/travel the world for the next few months so wth…
Ok, google the opinion of Elon Musk and Nick Cannon in regards to their parenting. Even the affluence and celebrity status does not give them a pass. In fact, I don’t even know what you mean by “gets a pass”. What exactly is a pass you think is happening, and who is giving it? Because legally, the deadbeat parents are held accountable. Public opinion criticizes them for being lazy/absent/inattentive. Is social media not a good gauge for the overall attitude to these situations? Because other than that and legal resolutions I’m not sure where else you’d find these passes given out, whatever they may be.
If she's set on living in Ohio for life, and you're set on leaving, you're at an impasse. One way or the other, one of you will end up bitter and resentful.
Just pull the bandaid off and leave, man
Seems like he is a bit immature. You made an honest mistake and did the best you could to make it up to him. If it “ruined his day” he really needs a reality check.
Holy shit, you took care of 6 children under the age of 11, while still working, on your own for 16 days?
Is that even possible? How did you fill all those tasks in one day and continue to do so day after day?
I laughed at the title. Then I read the text and thought oh no. That was a stupid thing to do. You think her sister is hot and you told her. Not just physically hot.
He got scooped into the manosphere. I think if you give it time, he will grow out of it but he needs to get off YouTube because it’s poisoning his brakn
He’s struggled with anxiety and depression his whole life, and had a bad upbringing. I think you’re right about likening sex with love, and any refusal as a rejection of him. It’s really difficult because I don’t have as a high as libido as him
Fetishisation isn't love.
Run from this woman.
Flirting = nothing?
I'd say it was a betrayal.
She made the correct choice only after already making the incorrect choice in flirting with some guy that wasn't her husband.
I'm aware it could have been worse, but would she still have flirted if her husband was sat there and witnessed it? No, she wouldn't have. If you do something with somebody else that you know your partner wouldn't be okay with witnessing, then it's cheating. Many consider flirting cheating, including myself. So to a lot of people, she did cheat.
She at least owes it to him to tell him.
I would say I'm shocked to see how many people are saying there's no need to tell him, but given how completely devoid of decency most people are, I'm not that shocked.
Have you actually sat him down and talked to him about it? If so, what did he say? Did you check deleted messages? Honestly it doesn't sound like physical cheating, it sounds like he's getting caught up in having fun, and not realising that it's emotional cheating, or close to it. He's reminding me of a Labrador that fetched a live skunk, without realising he was meant to fetch the stick. Cheaters hide things, they project feelings of guilt, they don't share things with their spouse. I'm rather suspicious that he's not aware that what he's doing is inappropriate and could get him in a lot, and I mean a lot of trouble if she goes to HR.
Lying is the big deal IMO.
Why are you dating someone who isn’t monogamous when you are?
She said she was “bored” because we haven’t seen each-other in a while.
You know some (normal) people help with their grandchildren (without payment) because that's what people do? Making sure the kids go to the bus is something I'd do for a neighbor. Wtf is wrong with americans? It's not like the kids live with the grandma while the mom is getting drunk in miami.
there’s your answer honey
Given what you've said here regarding “other issues in the marriage” and that you've spent not just a course of months, or a year, but eight and this is still how you feel and are treated? I'm surprised you've waited so long.
There's certain boundaries you don't cross and given that Kelly also looked uncomfortable…..it's very not-OK to mess around joking about people's fertility, ability to have children etc and honestly this dynamic sounds pretty unfriendly and toxic if this is all considered “fine”. If anything it seems like the guys are getting together and the wives are just “tag-alongs” that aren't really keen on being there either.
Only you can know if, in concert with your “other issues” this justifies a Divorce or not and I would surmise that you've already spoken with him about whatever these are – as well as having spoken to him about this incident as well and each time it's led to an unconstructive result.
If that's the case? Well done on tolerating this all so far, I wish you luck on your journey to either enjoying time to yourself and/or finding someone who actually respects you as a person, wife and Woman all.
Does he do these things with his male friends? Like, I could see something like a cultural difference looking romantic when it’s just platonic, but this doesn’t look to be the case here.
25 is way too old to be speaking like that in front of anyone let alone a woman, who has already said it makes her uncomfortable. Girl just say bye now before you get more involved, it isn’t going to get any better. Guys like this are more likely to cheat and then act like it’s not a big deal. Probably watches a lot of porn and goes to strip clubs lol ok maybe I’m just off on a rant now but trust me you don’t want none of this shit.
100 percent has been a topic of discussion is that she will take a pay cut and it's scary for her. Which I do understand but family is before money in my opinion which she seems to agree. I can get it being stressful to think about tho.
So then why is she already asking how you’ll provide for her when you two break up? 100% she is motivated by the money and financial stability you provide her. The only way you can know for sure if she is with you for any other reason, is to cut her off financially and see how long she stays around. I’m guessing, she won’t.
“Yeah, why should she get the pleasure!”
Girl, this guy sounds messed up and not quite right in the head, and he obviously can't deal with criticism in any form. Do you really want to tie yourself to a guy who denigrates you to invalidate your feelings and opinions? And doesn't his weird abortion speech ruin the mood for you? I know that talking about a painful medical procedure he tells me he'll order me to have would absolutely lead to me not wanting his handlotioned dick anywhere near me. In fact, if he wants to put hand lotion on it, he can just go on to give himself a handjob.
No, you definitely shouldn't. And unless you've received an invitation it seems presumptuous to assume you'd be welcome. Her getting married so quickly is not a great indication either, I'd stay out of this for everyone's sake.
He's putting his wants over your feelings. Stop seeing him. End of story.
Do you want 5 kids? She doesn't even have a job, all the responsibility of those kids is coming to you, you're twice my age, do whatever you want, but this just doesn't seem like great deal for you, sorry. Do you have any kids of your own?
It’s not the hill to die on. He doesn’t force me to do anything and he’s entitled to his stupid beliefs even if I disagree. Plus it is not like the subject comes up often. We got kids, jobs and a life to deal with so it is not an issue that is pressing to our lives.
Tell him to get out and go back to his country. Your child is 3….look into daycare or nanny. Don't quit your job. Just find a solution to a toxic problem.
Hopefully I don't get buried down here in the sea of comments but I want to switch the focus a bit. Yes she is an adult and is 100% responsible for her own actions. She chose to let these people tell her these things. She chose to keep being around them despite it all. She is 100% at fault but she did offer to change the whole situation to try to pursue something with you. In the end I doubt her sincerity like so many others here, but I also see something almost none of them mentioned.
You allowed all of this to keep happening. You sat there and didn't once call her out and threaten to leave her if she chose friends who disrespected you like that. When she said she was breaking up, you didn't call her out them even. You just walked away. Then, I went into hiding. As bad as she is (which is terrible at the moment) you let her walk all over you over and over. Perhaps you would be better served by taking some control of your own situations and relationship back. Make her write you a full apology and do everything she said she would do. Tell her you need those things before you would even consider taking her back. Let it be clear that you now think a lot less of her. You feel as if it's clear she is far to childish to deserve you and she needs to work on herself to deserve another chance. Then see what she does. You may be in for a shock at what happens next.
There are few black and white areas when it comes to relationships, but an agreement on whether you want kids or not is essential. Otherwise one party either ends up resentful at not having children, or the other ends up with a child they didn't want.
This conversation should not be happening now. It should have happened 8 years ago.
There's no easy answer now, but at 37, he's understandably thinking that he is already going to be quite an old dad and he needs to get a move on. If you really don't want children then you may need to break up before he ends up resenting you.
If you are in the states, joint custody is a thing.
I'm sorry for your loss
I would divorce
OP, your exGF's abusive behaviors cannot be excused — but perhaps can be explained, especially if you would speak to a psychologist in your city. They may be due to her having very weak control over her own emotions (i.e., a lack of emotional skills she had no chance to learn in childhood). My exW has that problem. If it is an issue for your exGF, you likely would be seeing 4 other red flags.
The first is a strong abandonment fear. I therefore ask whether, a few months into your relationship, she started showing strong jealousy over harmless events involving other women — or tried to isolate you away from your close friends and family members? She would view your spending time with friends/family as your choosing them over her. Moreover, she usually would hate being alone by herself.
Second, you would be seeing her rely heavily on black-white thinking, wherein she tends to categorize some people as “all good” (“with me”) or “all bad” (“against me”) and will recategorize them — in just a few seconds — from one polar extreme to the other based on a minor infraction.
Because she also uses B-W thinking in judging HERSELF, she would rarely acknowledge making a mistake or having a flaw. Doing so would imply, in her mind, she is “all bad.” She thus would blame nearly all misfortunes/mistakes on you and view herself as “The Victim.”
Further, to “validate” her victim status, she would keep a detailed mental list of every infraction/mistake you ever did (real or imagined) and would not hesitate to pull out the entire list to defend herself in the most insignificant disagreement with you. Moreover, this B-W thinking also would be evident in her frequent use of all-or-nothing expressions like “you ALWAYS…” and “you NEVER….”
Third, you generally would not see her directing her anger at casual friends, coworkers, or total strangers. She usually gets along fine with them. Rather, her outbursts and temper tantrums almost exclusively would be directed against a close loved one (e.g., against you, a sibling, or her parents).
Fourth, you are convinced that she truly loves you. But you frequently see her flipping, on a dime, between Jekyll (loving you) and Hyde (devaluing or hating you) — often making you feel like you're walking on eggshells around her. Such flips would occur in a few seconds in response to some minor thing you say or do. A few hours or days later, she can flip back just as quickly.
OP, have you been seeing strong occurrences of all 4 of these red flags?
I don't know what you expected. You're both 1-2 years out of high school yet you still committed to a life altering decision.
I can’t just leave. I’m bonded by the lease.
Yes, it will be a turn off for some people. There are things you do that will be turn offs to some people, just like other people will do things that are turn offs for you.
You're never going to appeal to 100% of the population. You only want to appeal to people that have similar values and boundaries to you.
So, you do you. Your dating pool will be smaller, but you're more likely to end up with someone who shares compatible boundaries and values so… win.
Yeah and if it is well moderated and thoroughly vetted then sure, I would agree. But look what happened to OP; completely innocent, had his picture stolen, the story got blasted on a podcast, and multiple women in his life heard terrible things about him that weren't true. He deserves a legal avenue to sue and get damages, from both her for slandering him, and the group for publishing false claims
Funny how that works here, eh?
Now you’re in another abusive relationship. How about you break up with this guy and you don’t start another relationship until you’ve been in therapy for at least a year.
Run and dump. But first cancel all your cards and change your bank accounts. A GF has no business in your wallet. Kick her to the curb.
My comment was not aimed at the GF it was to stress he was in a no-win situation. Also, he needed to get her into therapy. Please the whole comment.
As someone who was r*ped repeatedly by my biological father all throughout my childhood I am so fucking angry that someone who was never abused is trying to co-op trauma and suffering.
Yes, in 2023 we as a society have made a lot of progress regarding people being able to identify that they have trauma, even PTSD or CPTSD, but it is NEVER okay for people to just make up trauma. Or, in this case, to say she has the same trauma as her sisters. Just fucking NO.
I’m glad you are leaving her. She’s definitely an “I’m the main character” type and those people are not emotionally healthy. I am so sad for her sisters and I really fucking hope someone takes your report seriously and that her dad loses his job.
He won’t because he has money, let’s be honest, but at very least you can get the fuck away from this family.
Ethically I feel really solid about the choice to implement a boundary. The need for space itself/putting up a boundary to get that isn't something I'm debating at this point. It's wildly inconvenient/dangerous/unhealthy to let depression and anxiety get out of control (like suicidal ideation is a symptom that tends to pop up really quickly, and I need to avoid that). Since no one else except me is capable of giving myself what I need to stay mentally healthy, I've got to be on top of it.
T can get hyper focused on things at times. Sometimes that looks like not being able to let a thing go, and I'm pretty sure that's what's happening right now for her. I know that if I respond with a very short message giving the most basic update and reiterating the boundary, I'm going to get a flurry of messages back, most likely messages that are emotionally heavy. This is why I've so far not said anything. Plus I know I'm going to feel even shittier if I can't stick to this one basic boundary I've asked for.
What I'm really looking for advice on is how to implement the space boundary more effectively, while also minimizing negative impacts to the relationship as much as possible while still sticking to the boundary. What's your take on that?
Hey dude, I’m so sorry but I do you know that woman’s for the streets. Just a no contact with her there’s no reason to even talk to her you know everything that you need to know.
you've got a great plan there, stick with it, it'll work out
It’s true.
I'm in a bit of the same situation, only my husband does show me love. (I'm in my 30s, he's in his 40s) He works, I do a lot of the housework. But same as you, sometimes due to depression or pains an aches, not everything always gets done. (And sure, sometimes I'm just lazy and don't want to. And that should be ok too) My husband understands. Every now and again he'll be a bit annoyed with something, and I understand that.
Your house sounds much cleaner than mine. And your husband sounds like an asshole. He expects the house spotless? Jeez.. It's not the 50s.
You're right. His love for you should not depend on if you've cleaned the house enough. It's all sorts of wrong.
We have not. She wants to hold off on that conversation until we can reach a decision, which I understand. If he's fine with it, then it's changed, if he's not, we don't change it. But we haven't reached a decision even if he's fine with it, because I don't want to do it if the dad finds it uncomfortable, but she still would like to do it.
I'm saying that I've had limited contact with the dad, not her son.
even if it was 99% of the time which it is not do you really want to be with someone who acts like he does? Makes crude comments about you and your past under the guise of jokes?
Okay sure but if you were in my position, would you not be a little hurt to find out someone you were involved with had been sleeping with someone else for half of the time you’d been together?
You can break up at anytime for any reason…
….and this one is a doozy, i wouldn't stay one extra minute, thats highschool level petty shit.
He's not a great father, otherwise he wouldn't of cheated on thier mother and risked there happy family life for a 5min orgasm,.
If this is the case, stop sleeping with him, move him out of the marital bedroom and sit him down and say
After your many infidelity I feel like this relationship has run its course and I've given all I can to it and to you, so I'd like us to live together amicably for the children and for financial benefit, until we can afford to live separately, but I cant be romantically involved with you anymore, and I'd like to go out and explore whats out there as can you,
But one rule is to never bring the person into the family home until we live separately.
You marriage was over the moment he stuck it in another women. So
But try that and find a way to get him and you where you can live separately
He's not a great father, otherwise he wouldn't of cheated on thier mother and risked there happy family life for a 5min orgasm,.
If this is the case, stop sleeping with him, move him out of the marital bedroom and sit him down and say
After your many infidelity I feel like this relationship has run its course and I've given all I can to it and to you, so I'd like us to live together amicably for the children and for financial benefit, until we can afford to live separately, but I cant be romantically involved with you anymore, and I'd like to go out and explore whats out there as can you,
But one rule is to never bring the person into the family home until we live separately.
You marriage was over the moment he stuck it in another women. So
But try that and find a way to get him and you where you can live separately
Here’s the problem. You are looking for something. It doesn’t really matter that you are thinking that anything that might happen will be in the future. Best advice? Don’t put your dating life on hold because the woman you want isn’t ready. My hunch. You are going to be the rebound. The person after you will be the real deal. That’s how this usually works.
You walk away from the relationship. She does not make mature decisions and expects you to bail her out. She is trying to establish a sugar daddy relationship. You need to think twice about your expectations.
Ethically, your duty is to the long-term wellbeing of the kids. Without knowing anything about you or your ex – aside from this one-sided account of the breakup – it's hard to opine on what outcome would be best for them. Generally, I'd think it would be best for them to know their biological dad in some way, even if their primary father figure should be your new husband. But maybe your ex is a monster and shouldn't ever see the kids. Or maybe he'd make a decent dad, despite your post-breakup antipathy toward him. There's simply not enough data here to make a good judgement.
While the kids should be the primary ethical concern, there'a also a moral question about preventing a father from seeing his own children. Again, there's not enough info here to make any real conclusions. But from his perspective, he finds out you cheated on him (which the available evidence could lead to him to reasonably believe). Then he breaks up with you (which this sub would likely recommend that he do, given your slumber party). Then, while his trust in you is at an all-time low, and while you're trying to convince him to rekindle the relationship, you tell him that you're pregnant. He could reasonably doubt the claim you're pregnant, or that it's his, or that you would carry the child to term if it didn't win him back. So he says some unkind words in the heat of your post-breakup disputes. And then you disappear from town, never contact him when you give birth, and never confirm that they are his.
I assume I'll get downvoted for going against the consensus – but I don't think he was given a sufficient opportunity to decide what his role would be in his children's lives. You denied him that opportunity on the basis of one conversation, and without him possessing the full knowledge that he actually had children.
Again, this is all conjecture. Maybe you have a list of great reasons – aside from just being scorned – for denying him access.
She's wrong on a few things. It's not a false comparison. She is sleeping in a bed with someone that she could potentially have sex with. The same as if you were bi and were sleeping in a bed with a guy or girl. Secondly, she has minimised how uncomfortable you are about this situation. That is wrong, as is trying to justify it.
As to what you can do. You have already told her that you are uncomfortable. You can either consider it a boundary broken and break up. Or you can trust her. I would ask if there has ever been any kind of sexual or intimate history between them. Given that they are lifelong friends; if the answer is no, then trust her completely. If yes, then be more concerned. People with a sexual history are more likely to get involved again. But if they have been lifelong friends, knowing that they are both bi, I doubt anything would happen if it hasn't happened already.
Good luck
He knew what he was doing and now he’s manipulating you.
Lesson learned. Move on.
You can end the friendship and block without ghosting. Give a brief explanation that you feel like the two of you have gone in different directions and you think it would be best to end the friendship.
Your “friend” is being shitty for sure, but you don't have to ghost and be shitty too.
Jinxy poo?
Sounds like one of those fat, insecure, mean girls.
Tell her you'll drive her (them) there and she can give your hair a quick trim too. See how she reacts whether she's happy you're coming or unhappy.
What I mean is, she’s going to do it when she’s ready. So I would stop thinking about it as an issue to be solved then and understand she has to be ready, and may never be. So you have to want the person she is, not the person you want to make her.
One thing you did wrong here and it causes all of this, you talked about sex with your previous partners. There are things you can talk about and things can be easily misunderstood, this is one of them and it won’t do you or to him any better to talk about it.
This is my gf. She is not aware that she acts like this. And it's very stressful for me