0 views
PROMO!!!!! Buy my Snap4life + 4 hotpic for 60tks / @G1: Lick my pussy @G2: 3 Fingers Pussy [99 tokens remaining]
Date: November 3, 2022
PROMO!!!!! Buy my Snap4life + 4 hotpic for 60tks / @G1: Lick my pussy @G2: 3 Fingers Pussy [99 tokens remaining]
Grow up. I hope he dumps you. You are toxic
For you, what feels different about her going out with friends without you and going out on her own without you?
Get a lawyer have them handle the communication / custody things.
Sorry but at the point that he called the cops on you, you ran out of options.
Regardless, I don't want to continue a relationship that I know will only end in heartbreaks š
I feel like if I don't try to make a decision now whether I'm okay with her flaws or not, all I'm doing is leading her on and make the parting worse for both of us.
thats something i truly need to work on it. i hate my company and i feel too alone when he isnt around me :/ i guess its my bad to expect him to be the major reason of my own happines. my mind doesnt work in my favor when in alone hahaha, sad but true. and i know im being irrational. i know he loves me
How do I get over her?
By focusing on you and your own happiness. It's only been two months my dude.
You can. You've come all this way to get to reach your exit.
Want to help yourself. Block and delete. Lessens the temptation. And don't give me that “Oh I don't want to hurt his feelings”.
Your life is about you now. Every decision you make is done for what's best for you.
Fights happen though, it's part of it lol. You guys go overboard with your comments sometimes
This was exactly me in my last year before getting free. I went through 1.75L of store brand vodka in about 48 hours for 8 years in my late 20s/early 30s. For most of it I functioned if you donāt count emotional stability and the damage I did to my relationships. In that last year I had started to set rules for myself because I actually thought I could taper all the way off, and I wanted to incrementally cut down my intake but drink enough to fall asleep at night. I was still hiding it from everyone who knew me (almost everyone it turns out) so I already had a pretty elaborate method set up of dividing a handle up into various containers for covert opportunities to chug it and that was just how I drank, super organized.
In the last six months I was overcome with panic like I couldnāt get out of bed but I couldnāt hold still, vomiting, lots of compliments on my new weight loss and then, by the last week I was shushing a few voices that werenāt there and the last thing I remember was asking my partner if an earthquake was happening because everything looked like it was rocking back and forth. I was in the hospital for a week I think, being treated for DTās. I hallucinated a lot. The nurse there is the only person I was ever honest with about how much I had been drinking, and now this thread. But I hadnāt considered that my withdrawal might have been that severe because I was still drinking a lot, like 1.75 in 72 hours instead of 48.
I kept drinking for another month after that, trying to hide when everyone knew, and then one evening I was like fuck it and showed my partner where my last hidden bottles were and that was March of 2018.
Sorry this was such a long ramble. I just so very remember how centered around falling asleep drinking was for me. Ironically, Iām writing this at 3am.
He likes the attention from her and has obviously told you that he has no intentions of setting boundaries with the overly flirtatious friend. You need to decide if its worth your time and effort to be with someone who is willing to entertain such attentions for other women.
And also: your nose is full of character! My niece had a nose job to iron out the bump in her nose. She's gone from having a face full of character, showing that she belonged to a family of women with plenty of character (I could write reams about the women in my partner's family, they are admirable, every one of them, blasting through glass ceilings at work and managing all sorts of stuff, producing artwork worthy of Picasso etc etc) she now has the blandest of ordinary faces and I barely recognise her any more.
Why do they always lie? The absolute least he could do is be honest with you and tell you he never loved you. Please tell me you're not going to forgive him
Not necessarily. Most cheaters don't cheat with the intention of hurting their partner, it's just to satisfy a desire they have. When they get caught and they see the damage they've done to the person they should care for the most, they usually do feel a genuine sorrow.
Oh ok.. seems you've lived most (if not all) you're life there. I assume the country is in Greece? in the middle east? Somewhere remote, not the capital? Also seems that you're parents are v old school. Are you voicing your current situation outlook to them? or you don't have that type of relationship with them? I don't think you need a partner/guy to be with… you need to work on yourself first…train/study more so you can afford to travel or better yet move elsewhere…
Otherwise, you can try finding someone online.. but that can be v difficult.. long distance is v v challenging so you must be cautious.
“Maybe thats what the guys I like feel about me ig. That I'm too basic”
if you think like that, you will become basic. remember there are also 4 billion women out there so it would be useful to stand out from the others..
Heās probably just using you to get some action but doesnāt want to commit. Take that how you will, find someone who will commit or continue being strung along.
He could also be keeping you around incase his plan A fails. Do you want to be someoneās plan B?
My advice? Stay single for now, you are so young and still have a lot of growing to do. Focus on building yourself a life and a future. Thereās better places to put your energy in than guys like this.
I know the feeling , but from my personal experience coming from your perspective, not everyone is gonna have a high sex drive all the time.
My ex was all about it at first, and as time went it gradually went down on her end. She was not as sexual and her love language was different than mine.
I realized learning love language of your partner is very important, she taught me that. I didnāt even know what the hell that meant lol. Until she educated me on it.
Maybe try to learn his love language and that will help you find more reasons to be sexually active. Thats how it was for her. I neglected certain aspects of her own love needs and she was less turned on. Maybe he feels the same. The honeymoon phase only lasts so long.
If you love or like this person enough you will adapt or not.
Finding ways to compensate and still be happy with that person would be my advice. Learn their love language. I guarantee you will get hella laid after that.
You said youāll let her know when youāre free, thatās a slap in the face
Is it toxic because it didnāt end?
Decide what is important for you to keep and demand those things. You should not be put in a position of loss due to his bad acts.
Decide what is important for you to keep and demand those things. You should not be put in a position of loss due to his bad acts.
Decide what is important for you to keep and demand those things. You should not be put in a position of loss due to his bad acts.
Heās showing you who he really is. Unless you want a lifetime with a shitty father who doesnāt respect your boundaries, BREAK UP WITH HIM. This is your sign.
OP never said it was his girlfriend.
A change in behaviour doesn't mean a negative. Your jump to that conclusion does show a sign of insecurity.
People get comfortable and have less sex. Very common
It's generally pretty difficult to be too forward with a guy concerning wanting sex with them. Unless you are also a guy and he doesn't swing that way.
How do you know he got peer pressured?
There's almost zero chance it was thrown out. It likely brought in quite a bit of money, especially if there was enough of it to spread out.
Normal husband behaviour. We all do it lady. Just chill and tell him not too anymore. Yeah
u/MissAspen, it looks like you're trying to post a throwaway submission. Your account is too young and/or your comment karma is too low.
The right way to do it is to create a brand new Reddit account that begins with ThrowRA.
Please create a new account that starts with ThrowRA in the username and try again. Please note that we will not make exceptions to this rule.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
My wife and I were in the same and were before we married as well (I make 4-4.5x as much as her). When we began living together I covered the majority of our living expenses. For things that we did together (going out on dates, trips, etc) I would normally just cover her cost as the addition of one person generally didn't add that much. The hardest thing, and what I strongly recommend is that you shelve that idea that she is living a certain lifestyle because of you. We got in a fight and I basically stated that which is something I still regret. Yes, he can do things due to your income. He's sharing those moments without you because you love each other.
You really want to be the victim in this story, don't you? Nothing indicates that this is the case, so stop this train of thought and concentrate on your life man. This is starting to become pathetic. She doesn't want to be friends and I think this is the right choice, for her and for you. Don't be the clingy ex and especially not the stalkery ex. It hurts, but you're young and life goes on. It's really as simple as that.
Do you guys share who's going to be where constantly? Like if let's say he went out with some friends and his buddy brought a friend that was a female. Would you be upset about that too? Do you have reasons to not trust him? Did he invite her or did somebody else?
Edit: I swe you answered part of it on a different comment
This is Reddit.
Lawyer up.
Go no contact.
Burn the house down.
You can use them as a tool to keep bad behaviour in check. Like a cheating clause, to keep in mind that there's a lot more consequences if you do go through and get caught.
Thanks so much for this. I think thatās pretty much what Iāll have to do. I certainly donāt wanna hurt her feelings but, I donāt think I have much control of how she feels about what I tell her anyways. I appreciate your help!
Cheers!
Yeah, what you are describing is stepping back and establishing oneās own boundaries. Throwing your kids away for what your ex did is still absolute garbage behavior, but if you want to go about it in a way where you establish your own boundaries and step back while hurt, so be it. Thatās your choice to make and action to fulfill.
Thatās not what is happening here. Mom is trying to make others establish boundaries she dictates in their lives to show her a display solidarity. She is weaponizing her kids. We all know you donāt get to make boundaries for others, and thatās precisely what is happening here. In the way of threats if he doesnāt āchoose a sideā. She isnāt removing herself, she is asking others to remove her ex, or else.
Asking your kids to choose a side due to what your ex did that didnāt involve them is simply manipulation. So is that what youāre condoning? Manipulating others around you because of your emotions?
I couldnāt help but worry that he was suppressing his desire to explore his sexuality for me
I donāt understand why we give bisexual people who havenāt slept around this kind of leniency, or people who were virgins before they met their partner and want a ācollege experienceā or whatever.
I assume youāre a straight woman. Youāre probably attracted to men other than your partner. But you donāt tell your partner that you want to sleep with them and that maybe he should let you, because thatās disrespectful as fuck.
Being a bi man and never sleeping with a man isnāt anymore unusual as being a straight woman and never having slept with Chris Hemsworth. You might want to, but circumstances mean you canāt. Get over it.
Bit confused here. When the threesome started and you couldn't get it up, what were the other two doing? Did they know? Did they continue on without you?
my heart is completely shattered he didnāt even care or even try to fix things
Iāve gotta be honest as well, Iāve got a bit of a phobia about hearing people I know having sex. donāt know why. But itās really freaking me out that I might do.
Thatās a me thing I know. But this is really exasperating it
Bet 90 bucks you didnāt even read the advice part you stopped where i said the people in this sub arenāt going to do anything but call you a bad person
Of course he wonāt change his thinking. Thatās why he, at 29, pursued a child. Because he literally believes that if you were any older or had any independence, he wouldnāt have been attracted to you.
He has literally told you that you were a tasty piece of meat and that to believe otherwise is foolish.
Please please donāt raise your children to think this is normal.
Youāre saying that it is totally fine behavior to find a teenager attractive and that it is admirable to wait around until sheās of legal age to date her. Thatās fucking gross. Itās predatory. Its creepy.
Right, the woman in question said nothing, did nothing, said nothing after, OP spends the night upset about it and she says āok, it was inappropriate but I donāt want to talk to him or her about itā.
Sounds like Iām way out of reality with her comfort level
Its 230 am. I'm stressed thinking if I should clean or work. Life is not going great right now lol.
You donāt. You wish her well and move on.
Because at 20, especially as a man, youāre still an immature child. At 26, as a female, sheās a full grown adult and way more mature than you. Itās weird.
Argue all you want about not being immature bud you literally ruined your relationship by lying and cheating, soā¦ ??āāļø
āProvide head and analā?! WTF dude. Sheās a person, not a machine that dispenses sex.
If you don't wanna have sex : don't have sex and say it plainly. Say you do wish to spend more time with him but that you don't want to be more intimate for the moment.
You don't have to go into your personal history if you don't feel like it.
You just need to be honest and know you decide what you feel comfy saying or doing.
Internet mom here. Never have sex just because you believe that they wonāt like you if you say no. Because if thatās true, they didnāt really like you to begin with. Hopefully he wonāt ask. If he does, say Iād rather take this slow but I have really enjoyed tonight. Thatās assuming you do enjoy the date. Have fun. Donāt have sex.
at the end of the day relationships are mostly all about finding common ground between two people. that being said, would you be open to travel with him for a while as long as it doesnāt happen quite as often as he would like?
obviously this is something that you HAVE to discuss with your boyfriend. but first you should establish (with yourself) your own limits regarding this issue; how far would you be willing to go for him and how much do you think would be too much? after this you can put the cards on the table to give him a chance to meet you halfway as well.
You were already planning on what you were going to do with your sister BEFORE you even saw her.
Yeah, to a kind of intense degree. After mom says she thinks the sister is there, OP decides she's going to hang out with her sister, watch a movie, get some food delivered, all without even confirming if the sister is even there, nevermind if she wants to do all that. OP was planning to invite herself into her sister's evening right off the hop, with a family member she knows has a history of minimizing contact with her. I would probably do my best to avoid someone that insistent, too.
Which country are you in? I assume the US?
I'm sorry. I know you're frustrated but what mop?
Ladies and gentleman, the most versatile comment ever to be made on Reddit ???
The label is less important than the rules it implies. If you guys have a good thing going and heās not ready for a label maybe itās worth waiting another 1-2 mo, but define the āunlabeledā relationship as exclusive, at least.
look to rent a room in a house and leave. you cant afford to live with her and she is taking advantage of you.
I mean it is a shitty thing for him to do. As any good partner should consider there other half and there needs.
But as someone who has diatery restrictions (celiac disease and don't eat red meat) I would not risk putting something in my body that would make me THAT violently sick. You are incharge of your own body and what you put into it.
Yea massively controlling.
Also
He has said that his next marriage will be his last.
next marriage? He's been married before? So whys he in such a hurry to do it again
She's read this already. She actually told me, maybe its best that I didn't try to talk to them again, but I want to. I want to look them in the eyes and say this, so I can get that moment that they stole from me. It doesn't matter what they say back. I have a new home now, its with my fiance and you know what I'm gonna love our kids more than I love my flesh. I'm gonna go to their games, I'll drive them back from school, I'm gonna make every birthday a celebration. I'm gonna teach them how to ride a bike, how to change a tire, how to shave, how to drive. I'm gonna love them more than I love anything and I'm gonna be a better parent than they ever were. I swear by god I swear it.
I really hate to be in a position where Iām giving him an ultimatum :\ I really donāt want to break up. He knows I want it though because I ask often. Maybe I should say something similar to what you said without the ācontinuing this relationship partā?
I know heās been really stressed out with work and thing definitely havenāt been as passionate as when we first starting dating part? He says he gets really tired and physically feels bad after ejaculating so that plus stress might cause it? I know it sounds strange it can be a mental thing too. So he would generally before the month just roll over and be anti-touch and anti-cuddle post sex. This is also particularly hard for me because of my previous experience being sexually abused. I need the post sex reassurance. Also he has been molested by a family member when he was younger and this might play a roll into why he gets so anti-touch and over stimulated?? Iāve tried talking about it with him and it doesnāt seem like he understands why it happens either
Glad you used lub.
If itās nothing new, you donāt need advice. Mazel tov.
I know. Iām just wondering if what my boyfriend did is normal?
lol you gave someone a concussion sufficient to make him shit his pants while unconscious and then hes just up, no ill effects, “I kicked his ass now how do I get him to go away”
Is this some escapist fantasy you wrote?
Yeah I know itās the cliche āyour an idiotā type thing but I date a girl before her from when I was 13 till I was 17 so I have been in decently long relationships before and have been to plenty of counseling and shit. Basically I thought I wasnāt like every other 19 year old which is pretty dumb thinking about it now lol
He already is a cheating scumbag and already disrespected his partner
Thank you so much, friend ā¤ļø I spoke to my mom and we are good and on the same page but I still don't know what to do about my sister. She's an adult so it's not like we can punish her, but we can refuse to pay for her shit.
I will read these ā¤ļø thank you for sharing then with me.
She wouldnāt be my gfā¦ sheās putting herself in dangerous situations drinking like that and then tagging her location on social media. Itās never the girls fault but shit can go wrong sooo fast in these scenarios.
I keep thinking that itās my trauma and not his fault, but I canāt help but worry about the next time he gets drunk
As you should. Whether you want to admit it or not, your BF sexually assaulted you while he was drunk.
How do I address this situation in a way he will understand?
What exactly is he not understanding? You've told him (in broad strokes) about your past trauma and you told him that he basically assaulted you the other night, I'm not sure what he could possibly be confused about.
should I just ignore it because he didnāt mean any harm?
I think it's a bit of a leap to say that he didn't mean any harm. Drunk or not, he's still responsible for his actions.
How many times did he keep trying after you said no? How many times did you have to physically push him off before he stopped? You can't accidentally rape someone. What he did, he did with the intentions to have sex with you regardless of what you wanted. Does that sound like someone that doesn't mean any harm to you?
Is it just my trauma speaking?
No. Your trauma is obviously part of this and is no doubt making it more difficult for you to deal with these events, but if your BF hadn't tried to rape you then he wouldn't have triggered your trauma. Your trauma is telling you to be careful because the man you thought was loving and trustworthy just tried to rape you, maybe you should listen to it.
Maybe you can try one and see how it goesā¦if you are scared to hurt your dad Iād say start with your mom first.
Long run you prob would feel better getting it out, just having to deal with the short term that will suck
You cheated. Just because she said she will give you another chance doesnāt mean sheās going to automatically trust you. You need to show her, through your actions, that you are truly sorry and will not do it again.
Talk to her. Tell her how you feel and ask her where you stand.
I appreciate your kind words, thanks for your comment
It was not eatly stages of the relationship, she was with you for 2 years already, and the only reason she told is from fear his gf would tell you, she cheated only 1 time that you know, imagine if ahe cheated on her many job trips, just dump her man, she doesnt worth a penny
Existing in the same house isn't quality time. If you cannot make room for quality time together please let her go.
Is there a specific reason why you think I should leave her?
Cut this loser off asap.
OK, at least you tried š Try to get better at it. Use some of that money on going out to eat to take a cooking class- think of it as an investment. Or, learn from her, let her teach you, that can be kinda hot. You can buy the stuff and she can cook and teach you. I'm just saying, this is a small problem with several simple solutions, some that can even better your relationship if you want that to happen.
Started having second thoughts a few months ago when we got into a fight about our plans for the future He has supported me but now i think he has some issues with me developing further I know our relationship works a lot around compromise and i can adapt to change not sure if he can
The real question is are you ok being with a cheater?
That's an actual question not a statement.
To be honest it was just some petty drama we had through middle school and high school lol. It just came bubbling to the surface when we were both drinking and feeling a little angsty at a party. We were in a verbal argument and my emotional mind was fed up and wanted to shut her up so I threw the drink. Biggest mistake Iāve ever made ngl. I thought I could handle myself in a fight but for some reason I couldnāt do anything. She dragged me around by my hair for a while and itās kind of fuzzy but then I was on the ground with her on top of me punching me in the face. Thereās a video unfortunately lol. And as I said in the post I was not wearing a great outfit for a fight so you can probably imagine how I look in the video. It was quite humiliating, and my defense mechanism has been to avoid it and act like it never happened.
Yāall seem to think that just because thereās no set in stone plans partners can act completely against the interests of their SOs. Like a relationship is automatically less valid because weāre not living together right now.
The only reason I donāt live with her is that financially it makes orders of magnitude more sense right now to live with my parents. Like, orders of magnitude. I canāt fall into the rental trap right now and she has nowhere near the amount to buy a house (I have much more than her).
And like I said elsewhere I still think she would have done this even if I lived with her.
So, here it is. I think your husband is a compulsive liar and an AH who has cheated on you a lot and may have had kids with “that woman”.
I think it's high time you did some google searching of your own for “divorce”, “maintenance”, “real estate”!
If you really want to continue a relationship with him then it will need to be on your terms. It would take a LOT of therapy and a LOT of willingness to confess and an ENORMOUS amount of change from him.
bruh wtf
The question isn't what YOU want, it's what SHE does at this point. Are you the paycheck about to get replaced? Texts start deleting and she is saying “Noooooooo…” it just means those texts are going to be more hidden next time.
He's being sneaky and interrogating me asking me how do I feel about sex, do I have any boundaries in regards to being physical, what is my love language. And to top it off he tells me that he's been on dates with women who wanted to sleep with him on the first date. It's obvious that he's trying to see how far he can go.
Those are the deadbeat dads theyāre talking about
Yeah I have a tendency to self sabotage things I want ??āāļø thatās why Iām hesitant
DO NOT TAKE OUT A LOAN FOR HER. You will never recover that money, and she won't be able to pay you back. If she dumped you tomorrow, how would you feel about never getting this money back?
She needs to apply for public assistance, yesterday. You cannot afford to support her. Cost of living? She doesn't pay her own rent. You pay for her gas. She can apply for food stamps and use a food pantry/bank. She needs to work more than once, twice a week to get caught up. She needs to move to a cheaper place. She needs to disconnect her credit card from the account and reach out to the utility companies about their assistance programs. You cannot keep giving her your spare money; you don't have it to spare. You need to develop your own savings.
I thought I was being respectful and respecting his boundaries ?
Girlie, please reread this as if a stranger wrote it..
The person writing this is about to marry someone who by their own admission defaults all work to them, criticizes the decisions they wanted no hand in, then emotionally blackmails through silence to make you feel guilty *(and itās working..).
Youāve dealt wonāt this for 8 years, but this doesnāt sound like a healthy relationship to make legal.
Is their premarital counseling? Is he always this way?
Because it seems like he has a vision, yet will do 0 work and get mad. Are you a mind reader? Because if you arenāt/donāt plan to be then this will be an ongoing issue.
I think the thing I would think about working on is not moderating your language, but regulating your emotions so you don't feel like lashing out at people in this way.
I don't know if I understand the ins and outs of this particular situation, but that's not necessarily bad. What I see, as an outsider, is that it seems like you are stuffing your emotions (or possibly expressing them too indirectly), and then having an inappropriate emotional outburst when you've been pushed to your limit.
But when this happens, it's because you're not setting appropriate limits. I use feelings of resentment to check my own behavior. I shouldn't be giving or compromising things that make me feel that way. Resentment, etc are emotions that help you find and maintain your own boundaries for yourself, and it seems like you are pushing through those emotions and just absorbing them. You can't control your environment or your neighbors – all you can control is how much effort you put into the relationships, whether your expectations are reasonable, and how to handle disappointment.
It's hard to remember that people can be jerks if they want to, you don't get to change them, and efforts to do so will just lead to conflict and resentment. If they're not your people, you can't MAKE them into your people. If they don't listen to you and aren't good friends, find different ones. Hanging out here and getting resentful and bitter is not good. But you can't change that by changing them. You can only change it by setting better expectations, not giving/engaging at a level that causes you resentment if not reciprocated, and taking yourself out of the situation if none of that is going to work for you.
Also despite him playing softball and pickleball he is overweight. My sister doesn't like that. Which seems judgy to me cuz she's over weight lol
Maybe a LOTR SEE session? That would take more than a night…
She sounds like she has a good reason to be wishy washy judging from the previous relationships and trying to navigate that can really hurt, and it can delay you accepting that a relationship isnāt going to work out. Speaking from experience, this situation very rarely works out.
Without knowing more about her, she doesnāt sound entirely into it to be blunt. And the fact that youāre unbelievably in love and she doesnāt need to ask you to wait for her, well thatās a lot of pressure. Hell even if she reciprocated as much as you do, itās still a lot of pressure and a lot to live up to and that can break a relationship. So to me, just from what you wrote, it sounds like sheās uncomfortable being that person for you, and doesnāt really know how to express that or feel comfortable expressing that, so sheās being wishy washy and hoping things will work themselves out.
So my advice is not to wait for her. Youāre both 20, that is still very young and I get things are very intense at that age. Losing any romantic opportunity with her is not the end of the world, youāll recover and meet someone again. If you wait, youāre delaying the inevitable and youāll resent her more when things go south than if you start accepting that she may not be the person for you.
Your relationship wether you like it or not, the new made person will be around for awhile hopefully,
Speak with a lawyer, and one of you has to move out.
For the sake of your well-being, don't drag this out longer than it has to be.
its not that he doesn't change. he does, but ive honestly never seen it jump to the opposite extreme.
an old problem we used to have was that we *didn't* see each other enough, it was like once or twice a week, it was understandable. but it went straight from that to this situation and since then, the changes only happen for a week or two and just slowly phase back to what it was before.
Don't do it š
I appreciate what youāre saying. I will talk to my doctor. I think most people just freak out at the words genital herpes. Thereās such a stigma around it and not ācold soresā. Itās ridiculous
If you were my friend, I would caution against.
Eh. You gave him good advice, anyway! They don't just hand out medical degrees and I'm sure he worked hard for his. He should probably stick with that for a minute at least.
Your threat? And that's what it was. Reflects who you are. And what you need. And what you're willing to do to secure it. And you probably don't belong together. If you want to change that aspect of your value system? If you don't like it anymore? Do that. But I don't think you hurt this guy irrevocably. He's OK.
they clearly thought he knew. Yeah I guess they should constantly remind their buddy they all smashed his girlfriend
You are under no obligation to be her friend. Ultimately, this is your call.
Please elaborate ..
Reddit.
The compassionate choice.
Reading this post and your replies, I can see why he doesnt wanna spend your birthday with you lmao. Jesus christ what a drama queen. Ive met literal children with more maturity.