LDRs are very difficult, and they require excellent communication. There is a huge risk for jealousy, insecurity, and worries about how the relationship is going to work out. Especially for people so young, and trying to figure out where your lives are going to end up.
So don't joke about stuff like that. I understand you were trying to make a little joke, and you clearly had NO intent for this to happen, but see, here's the problem. Now, is he going to believe you? When you say, “no, it was a joke, I was going to say I love you even more,” I mean… that's also what someone who was trying to tell him something bad, then is trying to backpedal when he got upset, would say.
You're being absolutely truthful, but I'm just saying. You don't joke about relationship status, cheating, sexual ability, nothing like that. It's a recipe for disaster.
You're right to not spam call; let him read your messages, and hopefully you can get this smoothed out. Just be more mindful in the future
OMG… I'm so sorry for that I don't know what to say tbh… but please just know that his tears are not because he's sorry or hes afraid of losing you, but it's all because he got caught! So girl it's still time to leave , divorce his ass and go live your life.
Why are you with this person? He’s tying to take all your money and take advantage of you. And told you to your face that he’s going to do it. He believes he’s entitled to your time and money and he’s not. That attitude won’t change and then you’ll get a divorce and you’ll be the one that got screwed.
Even though you don’t want to explore the legal course, it would be wise to study what’s called “common law” marriage in your state. Odds are it won’t come to that, but it’s something you should be aware of. In some states, people that cohabitate for a set amount of time can be entitled to assets if a separation occurs.
I'd take a slightly less harsh position than most commenters here and say that the age gap doesn't always mean that your partner has nefarious intentions but would also say that you should be very aware of the power imbalance that is inherent in a relationship with that big of an age gap. I think unfortunately there isn't much you can do in the short term to have your parents be more accepting of the situation. You will be treated as more of an adult as you get older, but realistically I would say you'd need to be 25 or older for most people to be accepting of your decision to be in a relationship with this significant of an age gap.
Yeah, no. Not good. Don't let her try and convince you to fuck about with consent. If she wanted to fuck, she could've fucked. If she did and didn't because you didn't “take her” then she's playing games. It's bad news all over.
From the bathtub thing onwards it all rings familiar to me and it's ALL bad times. This person isn't going to take you to good places. It sounds like your desire is a toy for her and she can and will absolutely mess with you if she so chooses (or if you let her.)
What's the power imbalance? He doesn't sound like he has a bunch of money, he isn't a teacher, he isn't her work superior. Y'all keep using that term and using it incorrectly.
Kick that ho back to the streets. Bullet dodged before you got legally entangled or had kids. Good for you kid. Now, work on you. The women will find you as you build yourself up.
You put up a boundary, which is your right. But when you said or indicated no, stop, this is what started him to abuse imo. He wanted to show you or himself that it’s he who decides when enough is enough, when it’s time to stop. He’s abusing you
Dang, lots of people in this thread bending over backwards to justify blatant racism lmao. Imagine if I told my black gf I just don't trust anyone from her race. I mean jfc, think about what you all are asking her to be more understanding of, a blanket generalization of people based on their skin color.
Hey, hopefully you can fix this, but a heads up.
LDRs are very difficult, and they require excellent communication. There is a huge risk for jealousy, insecurity, and worries about how the relationship is going to work out. Especially for people so young, and trying to figure out where your lives are going to end up.
So don't joke about stuff like that. I understand you were trying to make a little joke, and you clearly had NO intent for this to happen, but see, here's the problem. Now, is he going to believe you? When you say, “no, it was a joke, I was going to say I love you even more,” I mean… that's also what someone who was trying to tell him something bad, then is trying to backpedal when he got upset, would say.
You're being absolutely truthful, but I'm just saying. You don't joke about relationship status, cheating, sexual ability, nothing like that. It's a recipe for disaster.
You're right to not spam call; let him read your messages, and hopefully you can get this smoothed out. Just be more mindful in the future
Is it his multimillion dollar empire that sealed the deal ???
OMG… I'm so sorry for that I don't know what to say tbh… but please just know that his tears are not because he's sorry or hes afraid of losing you, but it's all because he got caught! So girl it's still time to leave , divorce his ass and go live your life.
You have laid it out great for OP. If she’s thinking this is controlling they are simply not incompatible.
You know her best. Do what you think will make her feel safe, happy and accepted.
Why are you with this person? He’s tying to take all your money and take advantage of you. And told you to your face that he’s going to do it. He believes he’s entitled to your time and money and he’s not. That attitude won’t change and then you’ll get a divorce and you’ll be the one that got screwed.
Even though you don’t want to explore the legal course, it would be wise to study what’s called “common law” marriage in your state. Odds are it won’t come to that, but it’s something you should be aware of. In some states, people that cohabitate for a set amount of time can be entitled to assets if a separation occurs.
I'd take a slightly less harsh position than most commenters here and say that the age gap doesn't always mean that your partner has nefarious intentions but would also say that you should be very aware of the power imbalance that is inherent in a relationship with that big of an age gap. I think unfortunately there isn't much you can do in the short term to have your parents be more accepting of the situation. You will be treated as more of an adult as you get older, but realistically I would say you'd need to be 25 or older for most people to be accepting of your decision to be in a relationship with this significant of an age gap.
“Yea. Be a man. Show me how bad you want me.”
Yeah, no. Not good. Don't let her try and convince you to fuck about with consent. If she wanted to fuck, she could've fucked. If she did and didn't because you didn't “take her” then she's playing games. It's bad news all over.
From the bathtub thing onwards it all rings familiar to me and it's ALL bad times. This person isn't going to take you to good places. It sounds like your desire is a toy for her and she can and will absolutely mess with you if she so chooses (or if you let her.)
What's the power imbalance? He doesn't sound like he has a bunch of money, he isn't a teacher, he isn't her work superior. Y'all keep using that term and using it incorrectly.
Kick that ho back to the streets. Bullet dodged before you got legally entangled or had kids. Good for you kid. Now, work on you. The women will find you as you build yourself up.
It’s a lot to think about but I’m glad people here are putting their opinions on the whole thing Thank you for the feedback
You put up a boundary, which is your right. But when you said or indicated no, stop, this is what started him to abuse imo. He wanted to show you or himself that it’s he who decides when enough is enough, when it’s time to stop. He’s abusing you
That's a bit of a Red flag
Dang, lots of people in this thread bending over backwards to justify blatant racism lmao. Imagine if I told my black gf I just don't trust anyone from her race. I mean jfc, think about what you all are asking her to be more understanding of, a blanket generalization of people based on their skin color.
Yeah this is a dealbreaker for me.
Stop dating men that put their own Os above yours.
When you stay with a cheater you tell them that you are ok with them cheating on you. The only way to deal with them is to leave.
Find your self worth and leave. You should also get STD tested.