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Date: November 24, 2022
i’m w the gf on this one
It can feel like a betrayal when you think you've made a platonic friend but they then divulge that they've been thinking something different the whole time. However, in this case you'd probably be about 99th guy on this server to hit on her. So your chances of success probably won't be great.
I tried. He says he agrees and wishes he could change his schedule with this job but he doesn't know what else to do and doesn't want to miss out on things
LEAVE HIM!!
Why isn't leaving an option? Certainly not marrying him until you figure this out is an option? If not I think you are out of options. You won't figure out a way to get an almost 40 year old man to carry his weight in a relationship. He should know how by now
Pretty sure that’s only required before entering training or before deployment. Could be wrong.
Real question is why you think he’s cheating. If he’s done nothing, then you just need to take him at his word.
Thanks! That actually helps a lot.
It’s not necesarily that I don’t feel I can talk to her it’s that I don’t want to come off as mean as it’s sorta a weird thing to say (but maybe the work personality isn’t something I even need to mention .
Your right, I’ll approach her and just say I’m having a hard time focusing giving the constant talking and maybe see what happens.
This is possibly true. I pull out seasonal clothing and find pocket litter & $ all the time. So yeah it sounds legit.
you have a fucking boyfriend. The fuck?
DUMP HIM
Omg this guy sees you as a container to use as he requires to fulfill the fantasy in his head. He will def try to impregnate you.
Please up the birth control you use to an IUD or other semi-permanent type so he can't stealth you and knock you up by doing something to your pills or poking holes in the condoms. After only a few weeks he's trying this shady crap? No. He's unstable if he thinks it's any kind of idea to already be having children.
Well, there is one thing she can do: end the relationship. His behavior was so impetuous, self-sabotaging, and baffling as to actually make questioning being with him a reasonable course of action.
You can leave for any reason.
Personally in your case I’d change the reason from how he looks to the lack of motivation as that way you get away with not coming across as shallow.
But, you do have to remember what you decide to do here. Because it is entirely likely that a future partner of yours will do the same thing to you, and you will then feel whatever your bf will go through, but unlike him, you don’t get to complain.
Thank you, appreciate the input. From previous comments option 1 is my best course of action. Option 2 doesn’t sit right with me, I have never nor will go snooping through her phone – like stated only saw those messages as we where waiting on an Amazon parcel and was tracking it on her phone when it popped up. But you comments are valid, so thank you.
We weren’t together that long, but the ironic part is I didn’t want to be exclusive. I wasn’t looking for anything that serious, but he insisted. So I caved and said fine, okay, we’re exclusive.
So if the idiot had just done what I wanted to begin with he could’ve just told me about her and it wouldn’t have been an issue ?
Nah, don’t blame myself at all. Well…maybe a tiny bit? Just because from the first time we talked I thought he was full of shit, but over time I gradually let him wear me down until I trusted him, but I should’ve gone with what my gut was telling me from the beginning.