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nataly, 26 y.o.
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Date: November 6, 2022
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If divorce proceedings have already commenced, taking a lover is not cheating. In my opinion.
As with any infection – ask a doctor – as this is an infection that can be dormant for a while, perhaps years. Having said that – go back and retest. She should go back and retest. Then show each other your results – you want a paper result if you can get one.
No it's not something she could pick up from her sisters clothing – but nice one throwing her sister under a bus there. It's actually that comment that is most concerning.
As someone else said, have you had antibiotics for any reason – because that would kill it in your system.
Is this the first time she's been to the gynae in 3 years? If she'd gone and been tested as part of her regular visit in the past, it seems unlikely it just was dormant and became active now? But that's an ask the GP question.
I guess you don't live together, or see each other just about every day or she would have come home to ask you if there's a reason she tested positive. I would want to see my partners reaction to judge is they cheated/look like they're being honest.
Unsure why her friend would lie to you. Also unsure why she wouldn’t want to know. I’ve been raped before so I know how traumatizing it can be but it’s very important to know incase of STDs and such. I didn’t choose to report it at the time but I 100% regret that and wish I would have now. If the friend really did do that to her then he should face the consequences of his actions. If he didn’t, then you will know she lied and cheated.
If I were you I would be supportive and understanding but also be stern that it is important that she gets the proper testing. Say that you are scared for her health and your own. Maybe also say that you are protective and want him to suffer the consequences. If she is super defensive about it and doesn’t want to take any action to get tested or report the crime then I would consider it cheating.
This. This. Fucking This. This whole account is so painfully and brutally FAKE. I wouldn't even say it's the boyfriend. It's some loser pretending to be one of the rescued girls in his stories. The most obvious evidence is the comments. Anytime I see a post where the poster doubles down and gets downvoted to oblivion it is so obvious that the whole thing is a creative writing exercise.
Tell her how you feel but she doesn’t like it and keep going maybe you guys should go on a break then…. I hope things work after the break..
You clearly did not read the entire post. I never said that his behavior was okay. I never was enabling it. At the end of the post. I gave an update. Please go back and read it.
I think so too, unfortunately I will have to stay at her apartment next months for exams…
I did not say I personally considered it a reason to take a break versus ending the relationship. I said “people ask for breaks for any number of reasons.” And the reality is that many abuse survivors of all genders do ask for breaks because of abuse.
Do I think that's a good idea? Instead of exiting the relationship? Absolutely not. But it is a reason that other people use.
I did not cease to be my own person because I'm married. My wife can ask for access to anything and vice versa but if the answer is no, then that is the end of it.
It's not about having anything to hide, it's about not wanting to share everything. At least not until I'm ready to share it. I'm not always in a place where I want anything going beyond me. I'm a private person. If she leaves me alone with things long enough I'll eventually show her or give her access to whatever she wanted to see or talk about.
Forcing me to share everything all the time is the quickest route to me wanting to share nothing ever.
You should have your own space that is entirely yours. It's healthy to have your own spaces and places to retreat to.
Not so well, I see. Bye.
If that’s his best friend I wonder what scum the rest of his friends are.
You are not very worldly are you?
The woman is reasonably happy with op, but she's casting her net incase there's something better out there.
Op says she earns more than him, my guess is, that's why she's still looking. Op great, but she sees herself as settling for less than she wanted financially..
This blast from the past, is worth a shot to her.
Op definitely don't move in together..
Id tell her we are either exclusive from hereon in, no apps, no chance meetings. Exclusive or go our separate ways.
That includes deactivating dating sites etc.
Then continue th dm.
Ask her what she's doing now. When she answers, match her financial status. If she asks for a meet up. Arrange one.
Just past the meeting time, call her and end it, as you just don't get the vibes that she's fully content. Tell her you're sorry but your minds made up. Wish her the best. Then let her be stood up.
Maybe he's not attracted to vaginas?
You’re a girl, & someone he’s been with before. It won’t be that bad. Just ask him. If he says no, then so be it!
Your post reads like general advice to at least two of us.
If you had made it clear you meant it specifically for OPs boyfriend, fine.
No, it's both of you.
I'm sick of this. Seriously sick of this. She has a higher paying job than me. I don't feel loved. I feel used. I'm done with getting given out to all the time.
You're not obligated to date this person. Shoot her a breakup text. She doesn't deserve anything more.
It's weird. You know it's weird. They know it's weird. I say put the blinders on and mind your business. If they do become a thing you can yell Dad (insert name) is kissing his sister again. That'll be funny.
Don’t tell him. Not his business. Some secrets are better left secret. Btw – healthy relationships have secrets too.
Weird that the guy who knocked up a firm who was 12 when he was 24 would be into younger looking women. So strange, really out of left field.
It’s not? You can’t just say something is psychotic and it just is. Unless a girlfriend/boyfriend to you means something different to me you should absolutely be able to tell them what you’re going through rather than saying you need space. When people say they need space it’s normally because that person did something wrong. To not clarify is almost cruel.
Bur in the experiment they went ahead and doubled it. They did exactly what I said.
That’s what I think too. His real mistake was thinking I was going to support him.
I was accepted to all the 4 US colleges I applied to. They were all approximately 8,000 miles from my city. My then girlfriend was happy for me, and breaking up was just a formality, we didn't even discuss it that much. The college you go to is about your future, which is much longer than the 18 years you've been alive. 25 year old you will 100% regret making any suboptimal decision for a boyfriend, regardless of whether you're still together or not. Don't fumble the bag.
Aw thank you. That’s a really nice thing to say. But I know what he is like. He won’t push anything with doctors and if I keep pushing him it will lead to argument’s and I can’t deal well with arguments so I shut down and would basically stop talking if he starts to shout and end the conversation altogether. Then he comes back saying he will sort it out but doesn’t.
i definitely agree 100% i have no problem with female friends but i think it’s inappropriate to keep people on social media you have a history with especially one that you have a history with while your in a relationship. i really wish there was a way to voice my feelings without upsetting his. he claims he doesn’t believe in social media and sees it differently then i do and sees no harm in having her if he doesn’t speak to her. i have no idea how to meet both our feelings on this but i definitely feel if he cared about mine he would be more than happy to stop doing something that makes me uncomfortable.