you made a good point. both his siblings are married and he tells me about how his brother and sister-in-law's parents will occasionally hang around with his family, something which we don't do as much in my culture. and also his siblings are both married to Muslims. anyway, thank you very much for your advice
Why would you think it’s ok to carry on leading him on when you don’t find him attractive. Would you like it?
You need to break up, find someone local that you can see regularly and have a real relationship not this half life where you are in love with a fantasy of who he is and the real person doesn’t stack up.
Even if we were to overlook the fact that he’s a child predator, and he is, dating a student is 100% not ethical. Lets focus on what that means for you. Do you want a partner that thinks this way? What happens as you age, become disfigured, or ill, etc? Would you want your daughter to marry a man like your husband? He objectifies women and will never change, please consider counseling for yourself. You need to learn to trust your own instincts. The reason you’re here asking us (to prove what you know is true) is because the power dynamic is off. Which is why he targeted you.
Yeah I know it just doesn’t seem right to say at all that’s why I came here instead and thank you for sharing your thoughts, you don’t know you have an addiction until someone points it out so thank you
Are you actively saving for a house? You mentioned your overall salary, but how are your finances? People tend to adjust their quality of life to their salary and sometimes beyond. How close are you to being able to afford a house? Is it something that you are actively working towards, or is it something he is just using an excuse to hold off on having a kid?
I understand wanting to get a house before having a kid. Kids are expensive. Houses are expensive. It’s easier to save if you don’t have a kid yet. I understand wanting a kid and having a ticking clock that won’t wait until the perfect opportunity arises.
It’s one thing if he is using it as an excuse, it’s another thing if it’s a tangible goal. Have a conversation about it all. See where he is on all this.
Their biggest gripe is also the “why?” They don't see a reason for me to move out, the independence aspect does not seem good enough at all so they want a better reason.
Are you that desperate to want to keep a man who you “llllllooovvveee” who cant keep his dick where it belongs? Throw in verbal abuse, and manipulation and we can all see why you dont want to lose him…ugh
Wake up, open your eyes, have some self respect, and be thrilled that you can get out of this now.
I think you should give her a chance… But don't fully trust her
No he told me he doesn’t want a serious relationship with anyone just wants to have sex
see how those things you're trying to separate actually intersect
you made a good point. both his siblings are married and he tells me about how his brother and sister-in-law's parents will occasionally hang around with his family, something which we don't do as much in my culture. and also his siblings are both married to Muslims. anyway, thank you very much for your advice
Why are you still with him?
Why would you think it’s ok to carry on leading him on when you don’t find him attractive. Would you like it?
You need to break up, find someone local that you can see regularly and have a real relationship not this half life where you are in love with a fantasy of who he is and the real person doesn’t stack up.
Jesus christ man…have some self respect and dump this leech.
Exactly.
Even if we were to overlook the fact that he’s a child predator, and he is, dating a student is 100% not ethical. Lets focus on what that means for you. Do you want a partner that thinks this way? What happens as you age, become disfigured, or ill, etc? Would you want your daughter to marry a man like your husband? He objectifies women and will never change, please consider counseling for yourself. You need to learn to trust your own instincts. The reason you’re here asking us (to prove what you know is true) is because the power dynamic is off. Which is why he targeted you.
Yeah I know it just doesn’t seem right to say at all that’s why I came here instead and thank you for sharing your thoughts, you don’t know you have an addiction until someone points it out so thank you
Are you actively saving for a house? You mentioned your overall salary, but how are your finances? People tend to adjust their quality of life to their salary and sometimes beyond. How close are you to being able to afford a house? Is it something that you are actively working towards, or is it something he is just using an excuse to hold off on having a kid?
I understand wanting to get a house before having a kid. Kids are expensive. Houses are expensive. It’s easier to save if you don’t have a kid yet. I understand wanting a kid and having a ticking clock that won’t wait until the perfect opportunity arises.
It’s one thing if he is using it as an excuse, it’s another thing if it’s a tangible goal. Have a conversation about it all. See where he is on all this.
It's like me liking everything about my fiancé but I have leg fetish, a long one. And she have a short legs.
It can't be change, so just stick with your lies man. Cause sometimes the truth hurt.
Their biggest gripe is also the “why?” They don't see a reason for me to move out, the independence aspect does not seem good enough at all so they want a better reason.
Are you that desperate to want to keep a man who you “llllllooovvveee” who cant keep his dick where it belongs? Throw in verbal abuse, and manipulation and we can all see why you dont want to lose him…ugh
Wake up, open your eyes, have some self respect, and be thrilled that you can get out of this now.
Sounds like this thing is over, man.